Marchmouse Return
by Elrohare
Summary: Moving over from Tumblr we have the last story of Elrohare's Marchmouse series. Eighth and final story in series. When Freeze the Night takes over, the gang is sent back to Underland. Now they have a chance to win their old gig back, but they have a problem: Alice doesn't remember them.
1. Chapter 1

"Mally… wake up, Mally!"

Mallymkun the Dormouse heard the urgent voice as if from very far away. He squinched his eyes more tightly shut. Waking up was never something that he enjoyed, or at least it hadn't been lately, though the reason why eluded his sleep clouded mind.

"Mally!"

"No…" Mally felt himself hurtling towards awareness as part of his mind tried to tell him who was waking him up and why it was important that he do so. "Thackery…"

"Mally – we're back," Thackery whispered.

Mally's heart skipped a beat. He opened his eyes and stared. His vision blurred then came sharply into focus all at once. A set of mismatched green and purple eyes were shining in the semi-darkness. Evening was falling and moonbeams through the window lit Thackery's face. Dark hair spilled over his forehead and cheeks. His sweet, pink lips curved into a smile, and frantic excitement lit those dazzling eyes.

Thackery Earwicket, the March Hare. Mally's husband. A surge of affection flooded Mally and helped clear the cobwebs from his mind. He lifted his hand to touch one of Thack's long, soft teal bunny ears, listening with satisfaction as the Hare's breath hitched. Catching a glimpse of his own pale fingers, Mally came to a stunning realization.

"You're human. I'm human! Thack – we're human again!"

"Well," said Thackery, flicking his ear under Mally's touch, "Mostly."

"This means—this means—"

"It means I can do this again," Thackery whispered. He pressed his mouth down on the Dormouse's. Wet heat spiraled through Mally as he parted his lips and kissed Thackery back with abandon, grabbing on, holding him tightly. Joy engulfed him as a rush of memory flashed through him, bringing back every step they had taken to arrive at this moment.

This was the second time. Mally wasn't quite sure when they had changed from mouse and hare to people the first time, but it had happened so that Alice could bring them out of Wonderland to play in the Mad T Party band, at the California Adventure park. He was the guitarist and Thackery played the bass. Alice and Tarrant, the Mad Hatter, sang. The caterpillar and the Cheshire Cat played keyboards and drums respectively.

Mally cringed at the thought of Chessur. The cat had tried to kill him more than once. Apparently Mally was irresistibly delicious.

The band had lasted two and a half years. He and Thack had fallen in love and gone through many trials and tribulations to be together (many of which caused by the cat.) They had survived, they had settled down, and then… then…

Mally trembled.

Winter had arrived.

It had started off as a joyous time. There was Christmas on the way, and carols to sing, and snow that filled the air during their shows. Alice and Tarrant had planned a Christmas wedding, since their first wedding had been…interrupted. There was going to be a huge party, and champagne, and Thackery had promised to get him a wheel of the fanciest cheese he could find. Everyone had seemed happy, even the taciturn caterpillar and the horrible cat.

Then came the meeting.

The band had been called to the Lily Room in the Conference Center of the Grand Californian Hotel where they lived in between band shows. Managers from the park had been waiting, some dour faced, others with genuine pity reflected in their faces. The band's contract had ended and they were to return home at once. Only Wonderland wasn't home any more, and Mally didn't want to go back. He remembered clutching Thack's hand, fear making him tremble.

"At least we will be together," Thackery had said. "All of us."

"I'm not allowed to go," Alice had whispered.

Chessur and Absolem had to hold Tarrant back from the managers. The Hatter's fury burned as brightly as his red hair.

"No!" he had cried, "I won't leave you, Alice."

The managers opened the portal. A swirl of green and purple fog blasted through, and Mally felt himself staggering towards it against his will. Thackery squeezed his hand even tighter, trying to hang on.

"I can renegotiate the contact!" Mally heard Alice shout. "Don't lose hope, Tarrant! Wait for me! Wait!"

Absolem turned and walked into the portal, disappearing into the fog, leaving Chessur to steer Tarrant through. Mally saw tears on the March Hare's cheeks. Alice was his best friend.

"This is wrong!" Mally shouted over the roar of the wind. Thackery tripped over his own feet, letting go of Mally's hand. He stumbled backwards and disappeared into the fog. Mally cried out his name, then began to follow. He turned back and looked at Alice. Her face was stamped with fear and she took a step towards him. "Alice! Do it! Just come!"

He began to recede into the fog, his eyes locked on the pale young woman. Alice took another step, then bolted across the conference room towards Mally. Mally felt the force of the wind dragging him through the portal, but he reached out his hand to Alice, trying to grab hold of her.

In the same instant, there came an icy blast of blinding white. Mally couldn't say if it had come from Alice, or himself, or the Return to Wonderland. He saw a bright light flash and envelop Alice, then he was falling backwards and down…down… down…

The fall seemed to last an eternity. Mally wasn't even sure if he had been conscious the whole time. He opened his eyes, looked up to see the others looming around him… but something was wrong.

Alice had not come through.

Even worse, they had all changed.

The animals became animals. The caterpillar was a small blue insect. Only Tarrant remained as he had been in California. Mally wiggled his tail, and ran his paws over his large, round ears. He looked up at the March Hare, more than twice his size, and came to a terrible realization.

"Thack," he squeaked, "This is really going to ruin our sex life!"


	2. Chapter 2

When he awoke next to Mally in the soft bed at the Grand Californian hotel, Thackery thought he might be hallucinating from something that Tarrant had put in the tea. He had been drinking a lot of tea lately, while Mally slept in a spare teapot. Thackery had had to clutch that pot tightly on several occasions when Chessur had popped in, trying to playfully bat it out of his hands. He didn't trust the cat not to eat Mally, not when he was only a mouthful in his mouse form, and never more than barely awake.

He had thought it was over then, the beautiful dream life that they had lived in California. Without Alice, they were no longer human. She was the only one who could change their story. A tear rolled down his nose as he thought about it, onto Mally's beautiful, sleeping face. Thack ran his hand over the blond hair, touched Mally's cheek, wiping away the little drop of water.

Changing had not stopped Thackery from loving Mally. He knew that even if he became a flowerpot and Mally an elephant, somehow that emotion would still survive. Still, the desire to return to what they had shared made his madness flare up. Between that and losing Alice, he and Tarrant had both been a wreck. They had thrown themselves into frantic gaiety, reviving their daily tea parties, lacing the tea with Underlandian liquor and Wonderlandian Drink Mes and anything they could use to mask the pain.

Mally had almost never woke. He had gone into a deep hibernation almost immediately. Thackery had made sure he always had fresh cheese, and tea when he did open his eyes. He slept in a nest made of his old stage scarf, on top of a wedding ring that was now far too big to fit on his finger. Thackery had put his own ring on a chain around his neck, since it didn't sit right on his paw. Now, he reached for it frantically and a wave of relief shook him when he found it there still. He ripped off the chain, stared down at the gold circle on his palm, then slipped it joyfully onto the third finger of his left hand. How perfect to have hands again, if only for this reason.

"Mally!" he cried, hoping this truly was not a dream. "Mally, wake up!"

"Thack?" the Dormouse mumbled sleepily.

"Mally—we're back."

When they kissed for the first time in… in… what seemed to have been an eternity, Thackery melted like a pat of butter in summer. He clung desperately to his husband, exploring every inch of his mouth. What had once been familiar seemed exotic and new. Thackery's heart thumped in his chest, and he didn't pause for breath until they were both dizzy.

"Tell me it's not a dream," the March Hare demanded.

"I—are you naked?" Mally demanded, lifting up the blanket they had been swathed in.

Thackery blinked, then grinned widely. "Apparently. Are you?"

Mally grabbed Thack's hand and shoved it beneath the covers, bringing it to the evidence that not only was the Dormouse naked, he was ready for action.

"What do you think?" Mally murmured.

"It seems bigger," said Thackery, smirking.

Mally's blue eyes widened and he grinned. "Really?"

"No," Thackery laughed. "Come on, let's make sure everything still…uh… fits together."

There probably should have been more urgent matters, like thinking about how or why they were back in California, or looking for Alice, and finding out if the rest of the band had come with them, but at the moment, all Thackery wanted was to make love to his spouse. Mally reached up and stroked one of Thack's long, furry ears and his foot kicked reflexively. The ears were sensitive, erogenous zones that only Mally knew how to pet and scratch and tease properly. The Dormouse could bring Thack over the edge just by touching them. Thack fought to control himself, to make this second first time last as long as it could.

He couldn't get enough kisses. He nibbled at Mally's lower lip while his hands wandered to all the glorious parts of his golden lover. He pushed Mally back against the pillows, reveling in the Dormouse's rasping breath coupled with an uncontrolled moan of desire. The Dormouse's arms went around him and before Thack realized it, Mally flipped them over and stared down at him, clearly desiring the dominance he preferred.

As their lips broke apart and Thackery stared up at him, he blinked. Something was different, but his rampant urges for love were clouding his ability to tell what it was. He ran his hands over the mouse's back and arms. Somehow they were fitting together differently.

"Are you taller, Mally?" he asked curiously.

"Maybe. Actually, that would be great."

"I think I may have shrunk a bit."

"We can stand back to back later," Mally said. "I have a better position in mind right now."

Mally nudged the Hare's legs apart and Thackery welcomed him into a tightly coiled heat. He arched his back and gave up trying to think, or talk. Something felt different, but there was no change to the pleasure that Mallymkun had always caused to flow through him. It had been too long! Too long. And if this was a dream, he hoped he would not wake again. He grabbed Mally's hand, clinging as they worked together to open the gates to paradise, then climaxed hard before he noticed. Something else was wrong.

"Your wedding ring…"

"Hm?'

"You lost your wedding ring!"

In that moment, Mally met his pinnacle and collapsed on top of Thackery. They lay together in a sticky heap as they both fought for breath. Mally lifted his head and blinked at the March Hare, looking slightly confused, then sad.

"I must have left it in the teapot, Thack."

"Perhaps it will turn up," Thackery whispered.

"I'm sorry…"

Thackery shook his head. This was a joyous moment, and it was wrong of him to spoil it over an object, even if was a symbol of something they had fought hard to acquire.

"It's just a ring. Losing it doesn't make us un-married," Thackery said, trying to sound firm.

"I should feta cheddar hope not!" Mally exclaimed.

"It doesn't matter," Thackery assured him.

But it did…


	3. Chapter 3

Mally was pretty sure that this was the best sex he had ever had in his life. Who knew that being denied something could make its return so very, very sweet? As he lay beside Thackery in the glorious aftermath, Mally thought it had been almost worth hibernating all winter as an actual Dormouse in exchange for this glorious pleasure.

"No," he mumbled after a moment of consideration, shaking his head.

"No what?" Thackery asked, still sounding breathless.

"I don't ever want that to happen again," he said firmly.

"Really?" Thackery sounded hurt. "I thought it was pretty good…"

Mally blinked, fighting the sleepy feeling that was starting to steal over him. He chuckled. "Oh, Thack. No that. That—that—was feta cheddar amazing. I meant Underland."

"Wonderland?"

"Whichever. That place we came from. That place that used to be home… I have a new home now, Thack. It's you. If we can't be together there, then I'm never going back."

An angry fervor flooded through him, and he twisted the blanket in his fist. He glanced around the hotel room. The light was dim but it looked much like the last one they had shared. It was decorated in a pleasant woodland style, with minimal furniture. They had a table and chairs, a wardrobe, and of course, the bed…

"Maybe we are still there," Thackery said timidly. He sat up against the pillows and the blanket pooled at his waist, revealing the breadth of his chest, his tangled dark green and black hair and long teal ears flopping against his pale shoulders.

"No," Mally said, shaking his head. "I can see the theme park out the window. And this is our room, except for one thing."

Thackery looked around the room, frowning. "It's clean? I don't see any of your clothes on the floor or a sink full of dirty tea cups."

"Ha ha," Mally said, his lips twisting. "No, silly bunny. The bed. There's only one bed!"

"We really only need one bed," said Thackery sensibly. "But you are right, we did used to have two. Maybe we're in a different room."

"I guess I don't care which room we're in, as long as we are both the same species," Mally said.

"We probably should find out what's happening," Thackery sighed, but he rolled closer to Mally and snuggled against him. "How we got here…where the others are…if the band is back together…"

From the way he shoved his head at the Dormouse, Mally knew he wanted petting, so he began to gently scratch that spot where the teal ears connected to his husband's head. The March Hare made a soft, sweet sound of pleasure and Mally's heart pounded against his chest.

"I don't want to get out of bed yet," Mally said plainly.

"Neither do I," Thackery whispered.

"We could wait til morning."

"We could."

Mally paused and waited for Thack to tell him that they really shouldn't, but the Hare simply clutched him tighter.

"It was hard for you," the Dormouse said with a quiet realization. "I was asleep most of the time, but you, and Tarrant…"

"It was tea time. Always tea time," Thackery said, trembling. "I… I could use some tea now."

"There used to be a teapot in our room," Mally recalled. "There might still be. I'll get up and make you some."

But Mally didn't get up. He sat there scratching Thack's head and listening to the Hare's breathing grow more harsh. Next Thackery would whine slightly, then kiss him urgently, and then he would be good to go for round two. Mally smirked to himself as he plotted what would surely come next, but before he could coax this plan into fruition, the door to the hotel room slammed open, making them both jump.

"The frabjous day is upon us!" Tarrant Hightopp, the Mad Hatter, shouted as he bounced into the room. He was dressed in red and purple striped pants, a lime green shirt with sleeves frothed in an unlikely amount of lace, and his favorite large, teal hat. It was a very similar color to Thackery's ears, Mally thought, even as his pulse raced from the shock of the invasion.

"Tarrant!" Thackery cried with such relief and delight that Mally was almost jealous, especially when the Hare launched himself out of the bed and onto their friend.

"Uh, Thack, you're still naked," Mally pointed out, crossing his hands over his chest as the two hugged each other and spun around in a circle. "And I think you're definitely shorter now."

Thackery let go, seemingly unbothered by his lack of clothing – not like the shy Hare who Mally had married at all. His mismatched eyes were lit up with joy and a huge smile was plastered across his face.

"Tarrant's here, Mally," he said. "Tarrant's here."

Tarrant tilted his head and looked at Thackery. "Hm, I should agreeably agree with our dozy Dormouse. You are shorter, Thackery. Previously your head rose halfway up my hat…" He looked over at Mally. "And he is naked. So are you, by the by. I'm not. Should I take off my—"

"No!" Mally and Thackery cried at once.

"Thack, can you see if we have any clothes in the closet?"

"Stand up, Mally. I want to see how tall you are now as well," Tarrant said. "I'm exactly the same, of course. Absolem refuses to share any of his mushroom with me."

"I don't remember eating from the mushroom," Thackery said. "Did you, Mally? Now I'm curious. Stand up, won't you?"

"Clothes first," Mally hedged, uncertain why he felt uncomfortable being naked in front of Tarrant. Usually he didn't care at all who saw him. After all, he was an animal and he only wore clothes at all because Alice had thought it proper. Or perhaps nonsensical? Mally couldn't remember. After all, it had been a very long time since anything had made sense. Nonsense was far easier to understand.

"Sure," said Thackery, shifting back and forth on his feet. He looked eagerly at Tarrant. "Any chance you could make some tea?"

Tarrant took off his hat and began fishing around inside. After a moment he pulled out a large, polka dotted tea pot and a handful of cups. "Of course," he said, winking at Thackery. "You want the special blend, I take it?"

"What's the special—" Mally began but Thackery bounced over to the bed, kissed him on the mouth, then flung himself maniacally towards the closet.

"Let's wear some clooooooothes!" Thackery yelled. He flung open the doors to the wardrobe and began frantically tossing things in Mally's direction, though half of it landed on the floor. Mally caught a pair of jeans that sailed by, then leaned out of bed to grab the nearest t-shirt. Tarrant had begun setting up the tea things on the table, casually deflecting flying garments as he did. He had somehow made a sugar bowl, creamer, and a plate of scones appear as well. Mally's stomach rumbled as he saw them. When was the last time he had eaten?

"Thackery, you can stop throwing things," he groused, "And calm your ears! What's the matter with you, anyway?"

Thackery froze in his tracks, then turned around. His mad smile faded, and the sadness that stamped his features nearly broke Mally's heart.

"I don't know, exactly," he murmured. "But something is very, extremely wrong."


	4. Chapter 4

Thackery felt himself on the edge of a panic, or an anxiety attack. He knew he was behaving somewhat erratically and that Mally had noticed. It was as if he himself had changed during the long winter in Underland… not to mention March. Thackery closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Best not to think about March.

Tarrant gave Thackery a knowing look and handed him a cup of tea. The March Hare bolted it down, then stood there, still naked, clutching the empty tea cup and fighting to breathe normally. He could feel Mally staring at him, though the Dormouse had not yet gotten out of the bed.

"More tea?" Tarrant asked. His voice was pleasant, yet sinister.

"Please." Thackery held out the cup with shaking fingers. He couldn't bring himself to look at either one of them. Tarrant filled it. The splash of the tea hitting the porcelain seemed strangely loud, but the sound calmed him. Thackery lifted the cup to his lips, drinking it more slowly, but not much. He finished it in a couple of gulps despite how hot the liquid was. That heat began to steal through him, slowing his pulse and his heartbeat. He drew in a long, slow breath and began to feel better, calmer…sane. The cup slipped out of his fingers and joined the mess on the floor.

"What's wrong, Thack?" Mally demanded, then his voice softened. "What's wrong?"

Thackery turned back towards the bed and saw Mally struggling with his jeans. They were too small for him, it seemed, so Thack guessed that the mouse had indeed grown taller. He looked about at the clothing he had strewn over the floor and cringed. He would have to sort through it, and re-fold it and put it away. He picked up his old favorite pair of inky black jeans and looked at them sadly, knowing they would be too long for him now that he had shrunk. He handed them to Mally and smiled, though his heart wasn't in it.

"I'm fine," he murmured.

"Like Swiss, you're fine!" Mally said fiercely. "You just said—"

"I'm fine. Let's get dressed," Thackery insisted.

"Those are your pants."

"How are you faring with your own?" Thackery asked pointedly. Directing the conversation back to Mally usually served to distract him, and Thackery was grateful that it seemed to now as well.

Mally got out of the bed and stood up, grumbling. His own jeans were at least four inches too short. He towered over Thackery, who was barely taller than he remembered Alice being.

Alice…

Thackery bit his lip. He glanced at Tarrant, who was sipping tea and watching the two of them. Tarrant was here without Alice, and Thack was scared to ask what had happened to her.

Mally took Thackery's jeans and held them up. "These will be too long, but that's better than this. Also, my t-shirt looks tiny."

"The solution is easy enough," Tarrant said, gesturing with his cup. "Both of you can borrow things from my closet. It was fully stocked when I arrived back, and clearly the two of you are lacking in hats."

"Or we just trade clothes," said Thackery sensibly.

"Good idea." Mally headed towards the bathroom. "I'm just going to change into these and…" he picked up a shirt from the floor. "This one was yours, wasn't it, Thack?" He held up a black t-shirt with the Mad T Party logo on it.

"It was my favorite," Thackery sighed. "Wait, didn't you have one, too?"

"Maybe?" Mally hedged. "Here, you take this. It was my favorite."

Thackery took the t-shirt and held it up. The front was emblazoned with a giant wedge of cheese. "Really?"

"Hey, that's by a famous designer. It's a Louis Fromage!" Mally said as he strutted into the bathroom.

"Are you sure that's not a Brie Anna Garcia?" Tarrant asked.

Thackery admired Mally's longer, leaner frame. It was so strange that the mouse was now taller than him, but there was something comforting in it as well. As the door to the bathroom closed, he looked at the Hatter. Thackery knew he was still anxious, but he couldn't feel it just then. He smiled, knowing his expression was slightly dreamy.

"Enjoying your Drink Me?" Tarrant asked pleasantly.

"Yes," Thackery said, his voice low and soft. "Listen, Tarrant, can you maybe leave me the bottle of whatever you put in the tea? I think I'm going to need it."

"I'm afraid I haven't much left," the Hatter sighed. "You used most of it in March. However there are available replacements here. Meet me in the lounge tomorrow night at precisely eight o'clock and we can discuss your options."

"All right," Thackery said, both disappointed and confused. "I… should put my clothes on."

"If you like," Tarrant said. "But I think you should put Mally's clothes on instead. After all, that was your idea."

Thackery nodded numbly, fishing another pair of Mally's jeans off of the floor. He found some boxers that he also recognized as Mally's, grateful that everything appeared to be clean. He slipped everything on and it fit like a glove. He was just as short now as Mally had been. It was strange, but under the influence of the Drink Me, it didn't bother him at all. Riding the sweet wave of numbness that was growing inside of him, he began carefully picking up the clothes and meticulously folding them before putting them back in the wardrobe.

"Should I ask where the others are?" he said vaguely, unable to mention Alice. "And how they are?"

"The where and the how are simple – we arrived just as we left," Tarrant said. "Although there was some confusion in the portal and the two of you were dumped out here instead of in the Lily Room with Absolem and Chessur and myself. You missed a very tedious meeting with the managers. They seem to be full of strange ideas these days."

Thackery stopped folding clothes and looked over at Tarrant. "I hesitate to ask what you consider to be a strange idea."

"You may ask if you like, but I really can't explain anything until band meeting tomorrow," Tarrant said cavalierly. He took off his hat and began putting the tea things away as Mally came out of the bathroom.

"Wait, Tarrant! I wanted a scone!" Mally said. He'd been playing with his hair, Thackery thought. It was sticking up all over the place.

"Alas, we haven't got any scones," Tarrant said sadly, putting his hat back on.

"You just put a dozen of them in your hat!" Mally said, waving his hand frantically.

"You're mistaken," Tarrant said pleasantly. "I must take my leave. Tomorrow at ten, then."

"In the morning?" Mally sounded flabbergasted. Tarrant stopped smiling. He grasped the Dormouse by the chin and peered into his eyes. If the Drink Me hadn't made him so calm, Thackery would have been unsettled by the intimacy of the gesture. Mally seemed slightly startled. He licked his lips nervously.

"I think you will find that you have slept long enough, Mallymkun," the Hatter said. "Your hibernation is over, and you will want to stay awake."

"Uh…okay…" said Mally.

"Good," said Tarrant. He smiled benevolently then leaned forward and kissed Mally on the nose before letting go of his chin and opening the door.

"Tarrant," Mally said to the Hatter's back, causing him to pause, "Where is Alice?"

Tarrant did not turn back around. He simply stood up straighter and adjusted his hat. "Alice is gone," he said, and the door clicked quietly shut behind him.


	5. Chapter 5

"What does he mean, Alice is gone?" Mally demanded, turning towards Thackery after the Mad Hatter had exited their room. Thack seemed to have calmed down some, which was good, because Mally was never quite sure what to do when his husband became frantic.

"Alice can't be gone," Thackery said stubbornly.

"But Tarrant said—"

"Tarrant says a lot of things," Thackery said shortly, looking up at Mally. He blinked slowly. "This will take some getting used to, seeing you way up there."

Mally grinned, even though he knew that Thackery had a habit of changing the subject by bringing it back around to the Dormouse. Oh well, Mally was awfully interesting, after all.

"You are really adorable that size, you know," he said, slipping his arms around the Hare's waist and pulling him taut against his own body. He began lowering his lips to Thack's, but his stomach growled, causing Thackery to giggle and spoiling the moment.

"You're hungry," the March Hare said, reaching up to stroke Mally's cheek.

"Yeah, well, Tarrant had a whole plate of scones that he could have left here. A whole plate!" Mally frowned. "Let's call room service."

"I don't know if we have the same privileges as we had last time," Thackery murmured. "I suppose we will find out at the meeting tomorrow morning."

"I can't wait til then to eat," Mally complained.

"Hm." Thackery tilted his head, then leaned forward and jammed his hand into the pocket of the jeans Mally was wearing. A moment later he pulled out a couple of folded twenty dollar bills and Mally's eyes went wide. "Here, let's go buy something to eat. Judging from the lights, the park is still open."

"Can we get into the park?" Mally asked. "We used to have ID cards for that."

"Check my other pocket," Thackery suggested.

"It's my pocket now! I call dibs on all the money in all of your clothes!" Mally yelled as Thackery went to the closet and rummaged around, then pulled out Mally's old leather jacket.

"You always used to keep your ID in here," Thackery said.

A moment later they had each other's IDs in hand. Trading back, Mally looked at his old picture and blinked. He had changed so much since the day that was taken, and not just in size. He sighed. "Why don't we just go to one of the restaurants downstairs in the hotel? Or the bar!"

"Well," Thackery said, tilting his head and making Mally want to grab hold of his furry ear, "I want to take a look around the park."

"For Alice?"

"Yeah."

"She has to be here somewhere, Thack. But how are we going to get back into this room?"

"Stop worrying, Mally," Thackery said, handing the Dormouse a pair of boots. "There's a key on the table next to the door. And, our own boots should still fit us. So let's go see what we can find out. I'd also like to look for Absolem, but I'm not sure exactly how to go about finding him."

Mally nodded. His head was filled with questions and worries, but there wasn't much choice but to put them aside and see for themselves what was going on. He glanced over at the telephone and wondered if they could call anyone, but he didn't remember any of their old managers' numbers. Taking a deep breath, he put on his boots, picked up the room key, and grabbed Thackery's hand.

"Let's go."

Mally brushed aside his fears and yanked open the door. The hallway looked the same as it ever had. He turned and looked at the number of the room, and it was indeed different from the one they had previously shared.

"We were three doors down," Thackery said vaguely, pointing in the direction of where they had previously lived. "I think this room is bigger."

"Nah, you're just smaller," Mally teased. "Well, at least I remember the way to the elevator."

They walked slowly, looking around and taking in the surroundings they had once taken for granted. Mally felt a fierce swell of emotion. This was where they had fallen in love, where they had faced so many dangers and trials. He loved this hotel, and he hoped they were here for more than a short stay.

"They would not have brought us back if they didn't expect us to perform," Thackery said quietly as he pushed the button for the elevator. "We are here for a reason, so Alice must be here too."

"She was the one arranging for us to return," Mally insisted as they arrived in the lobby. "She has to be here!"

They stepped out of the elevator and looked around. The hotel was as elegant yet welcoming as it had always been. The lobby bustled with both business travelers and families on vacation. There was a large fireplace to one side, the entrance to the gift shop, to the bar…and a large vase of artfully arranged flowers sitting on a table that Thackery had begun to drift towards, licking his lips.

"Thack!" Mally snapped, grabbing his arm. "You can't eat those!"

Thackery whined and tried to pull away for a moment, then hung his head and sighed. "I know," he sighed, "But I haven't had really good flowers in a long time. Everything is dead in Tulgey in the winter except those stupid talking flowers and I'm really against eating things that talk, despite what Chessur says—"

"I do NOT want to know what Chessur has to say about eating things that talk!" Mally snapped, letting go of Thackery and putting his hand up in a "stop" motion. "I'm well aware of his opinion and frankly not in a much of a hurry to see him again."

"What a shame," came the voice of the Cheshire Cat just in Mally's ear. The Dormouse jumped a foot in the air and spun around to see the drummer standing there. "I've just been dying to see you again, Mally. Here I was hoping that you would feel the same."

"Leave him alone, Chess," Thackery said fiercely but Mally simply stared at him with his mouth open.

The cat had changed. He was no longer as large and sleek as he had last been in his human form. He was thin and wiry, and a hair taller than the Hare. Mally was glad to see he now towered over his old nemesis, but that didn't put his fears completely to rest. Chessur looked as sly and wily as ever, his electric green eyes gleaming wickedly as he looked Mally over. His blue hair, which he had always kept slicked back on his head when not performing with the band, was sticking up in every direction. He was dressed in one of his old suits, but it was far too loose on him, giving him a saggy and unkempt look.

"How delightful that there now seems to be more of you," Chessur said, looking up at the Dormouse. "I regret that I can't say the same. Winter wasn't kind to any of us, I suppose. I wonder what it will take for me to regain my previous stature."

Mally sputtered. Despite his outward appearance, nothing had really changed with the cat, had it? He really could come up with no retort, but Thackery put a calming hand on his shoulder.

"Have you seen Alice?" Thackery demanded.

"You do like changing the subject, don't you, Mr. Earwicket? Very well. No, I have not seen her, but I do have an idea of where she might be."


	6. Chapter 6

Mally clutched Thackery's hand tightly as the two of them plus Chessur headed into Disney California Adventure park. Thack thought the Dormouse would break his fingers if he squeezed any harder but he said nothing since he knew that the bravado Mally was attempting to display was false, and that he was just as frightened of Chessur as always.

If it hadn't been for the relaxing Drink Me Tea that Tarrant had given him, Thackery might have felt just as nervous himself. After all, he had spent most of the winter protecting the hibernating Dormouse, and he couldn't believe that just because they were all human, or mostly human again, that Chess could be trusted.

Despite how glib the cat was acting, he looked terrible and worn down. Thackery nearly felt sorry for him. He wondered if Chessur was as relieved to be back in California as he and Mally were.

"It's changed," Mally said with childlike wonder in his voice as they strolled into the area that had once been known as Condor Flats. It had a new name now, Thackery noticed on the signs. It was called Grizzly Peak Airfield. The area didn't seem terribly different besides the new signs, fresh paint, and new name for the restaurant. But…

"I hope it's still there," he mumbled softly.

"Hope what is still where?" Chessur raised his eyebrows.

"He means Soarin' Over California," Mally said rudely. "If you were really his friend you would know that's Thackery's favorite ride."

"And here I thought YOU were his favorite ride," Chessur said, smirking.

"Shut up."

"Grow up."

"Will the two of you please stop?" Thackery asked quietly. He had stopped walking in front of the entrance to Soarin' Over California. It was still there. It hadn't changed. His heart skipped a beat.

"Do you want to ride it?" Mally asked. He still held on to Thackery's hand, but at least his death grip had eased slightly.

"It will wait," Thackery said softly, but he felt a lot of love in that moment, knowing that his hungry husband was willing to put off his own needs for Thackery. "Do you want to eat at the—the—" He looked at the sign. "Smokejumpers?"

"Really, we can do better," said Chessur. "I'm not entirely certain why we passed up Napa Rose."

"That would take too long," Thackery sighed. "Besides, we don't have reservations—"

"I don't need reservations," Chessur smirked.

"—and it's too expensive—"

"Not for me."

"This place is fine," Mally said loudly, dragging Thackery towards the grill. "Why don't you go eat by yourself at Napa Rose, Chessur?"

"I suppose I can suffer through what will undoubtedly be a travesty of a dining experience for my first meal back here in the interest of saving time," the cat sighed dramatically as he wandered into the restaurant after them. "I'll get a table. Bring me something with bacon on it and a carton of milk."

Thackery smiled fondly as Mally muttered to himself as they got in line to order. Even in his irritation Mally was adorable, and there was something comforting about being small. Mally had finally let go of his hand, so Thackery slipped his arms around the Dormouse's waist, pressing his cheek against Mally's shoulder as they waited.

"You're bigger than him now," Thackery pointed out as Mally's gaze wandered nervously to the corner where Chessur was sitting. The cat had picked up some plastic silverware and a large stack of napkins which he was slowly shredding with the sharp looking claws that hid in the tips of his human fingers. "You don't need to be afraid."

"He's probably still stronger than me," Mally said, his voice turning squeaky as he added, "And you know he still wants to eat me!"

Thackery nodded. "He might."

"He does!"

"Very well, but he can't. And he doesn't dare. He doesn't want to go back to Underland either, Mally. Can't you tell? Do you think he would be clinging to us and looking for Alice if he did?" Thackery sighed.

"I don't know," Mally mumbled. "I don't feel safe."

"I won't let anything happen to you," Thackery promised.

Mally nodded, but he looked doubtful. Before they could discuss it further, it was their turn to order. Thackery was grateful that the food was presented quickly, that he was able to get a cup of tea, and that Mally didn't complain about paying for the cat's meal. Despite what he had said about Napa Rose, Thackery didn't believe that Chessur had any money on him, and it wasn't in him to leave the cat hungry, especially with the way he looked at Mallymkun.

The three of them ate quickly and silently, betraying the necessity of the meal. Questionable quality or not, Thackery enjoyed his salad, pilfered half of Mally's onion rings and wished he had ordered a chocolate shake. He also wished that the tea had Tarrant's special additive because it was beginning to wear off and Thackery could feel his nerves growing raw, anxiety creeping up on him. He fought it off as best he could, knowing that this was not the time to appear weak.

When the food was gone, the three of them sat back contentedly in their chairs, looking at eat other with glassy eyes. Mally blinked slowly, as if he were growing sleepy, but a floating smile from the cat made him sit bolt upright. He reached out for Thackery's hand, but the Hare stuffed a napkin into his greasy fingers.

"Where do you propose we begin to look for Alice?" Thackery asked Chessur pointedly. The cat's inhuman smiled wavered, but didn't fade.

"It doesn't matter where we begin," Chessur said. "After all, it's more about where we end. So the start doesn't matter."

"That doesn't make any sense," said Mally.

"But it does," Thackery said with understanding. "We should start at the end."

"How can we do that?" Mally snapped.

"It's simple," said Chessur. Thackery nodded. "We go to the stage," they said at once.

"Don't do that. It's creepy," said Mally. "But yes, okay. How do we know the stage is even there?"

"The easiest way to find that out is to look," Thackery said. He reached out and touched Mally's hand, and his wedding ring glinted in the dim light.

"I see Mrs. Earwicket has lost something," Chessur said, looking pointedly at their fingers.

"First of all, I'm his husband, not his wife," Mally said. "So that would be Mr. Earwicket. Wait, am I Mr. Earwicket now? I've never had a last name before. Except Dormouse. Which isn't really a name, per se…"

"None of that matters," Thackery said, hearing irritation begin to creep into his own tone. "It's just a ring. Just a symbol," he insisted, but he suspected he was trying to convince himself more than anyone else.

"I will find it," Mally promised softly. "Just let's… let's find Alice first. We will go see if the stage is where we left it."

"Oh, I believe that it is where we left it," said Chessur, "Just not how we left it."

"Let's just go and find out."


	7. Chapter 7

They headed through Carthay Circle, past the fountain at the center which was lit up and splashing merrily. Mally grinned at the familiar sight and remembered dining with Thack at the Carthay Circle restaurant. That had been a rough time in their lives, but it had been a fantastic dinner. Maybe if the Disney people were going to pay them again, they could eat there under better circumstances.

He laughed nervously to himself. He certainly was preoccupied with food at the moment, even though they had just eaten. He glanced over at Chessur, expecting the cat to be staring at him hungrily, but Chessur was also looking around the Circle, perhaps not with the wonder that Mally felt, but at least with some satisfied interest. He looked as close to happy as Mally had ever seen him.

Past the circle lay Hollywoodland. Inside that was the entrance to the Mad T Party, the area where their show took place. The band played on a giant tea table. Two bars plied the guests with drinks. There was a large dance floor and in back a game arcade. Mally had wandered in there once or twice and never seen anyone inside.

The Dormouse's heart sped up as they walked slowly down the street, dodging the crowds of people. None of them spoke, but Mally could sense Thackery's very high tension. Mally wanted to take Thack's hand again, but he also wondered if he shouldn't stop clinging to him. He really was much taller than he had previously been and the cat looked emaciated and small. Mally could take him now, couldn't he?

He glanced over to the left at Award Wieners, the hot dog restaurant where he and Chess had both briefly worked, and shuddered. Vaguely he noticed that the menu had changed since then, but mostly he fought off the bad memory of being locked in the freezer.

"I hate the cold," he muttered. Thackery smiled at him.

"It's April. It should be warm here soon. Do you want your coat?" Thackery was wearing what had been Mally's favorite leather jacket. Mally shook his head. It was his own fault he was wearing short sleeves on a chilly night, but that had not been what he meant.

"You keep it. It looks really cheddar good on you."

"It smells like you," Thackery said.

Chessur rolled his eyes. "Like cheese?"

"Strawberries," Thackery said in a dreamy voice. "And summer."

"Wait, did I miss March?" Mally asked, wondering how that could have been possible, even though they had been in Underland.

"You missed most of the last six months," Thackery said softly. Before the seriousness of that could hit Mally, they turned the corner towards the Mad T Party.

Only, it wasn't the Mad T Party any more.

The chairs were no longer around the tea table. It had been painted blue instead of its normal cheerful orange. In fact, everything appeared to be a frosted blue and white. The sign over the gate had been changed.

"Freeze the Night?" Mally asked, his hand balling into a fist.

"Welcome home," Chessur said bitterly.

"What have they done?" Thackery whispered.

The three of them walked through the gate which had once been known as the Rabbit Hole. Music was pulsing, lights were flashing, and people were dancing. Mally could see the light up ice cubes in the drinks, just like they had been when the band had played there. He swallowed hard. Suddenly he really wanted one of those drinks.

They made their way inside, to the back of the dance floor, standing in front of the tech booth. Mally looked up to see if any of the stage techs he had known were inside, but the people running the show now were strangers. He turned to stare at the stage and his mouth dropped open.

"Is that Nivens up there DJing?" Mally asked.

"It sounds like him," Thackery said.

"It looks like him," Chessur added.

"Where are his ears?" Mally demanded.

"Where are YOUR ears?" Chessur jeered.

"They are probably up in that hat he's wearing," Thackery pointed out. "We need to go talk to him. Maybe he knows where Alice is!"

"If it's really April, those winter outfits sure are out of place," Mally pointed out as some dancers joined Nivens on the stage.

"It's just the theme of this show, you cheese munching idiot," said Chessur. "Winter."

"So they sent us away to put in a winter themed show?" Mally asked, flabbergasted. "Why would anyone want to see that?"

"There are plenty of people here who seem to be having a perfectly nice time," Chessur pointed out, gesturing to the crowded dance floor.

"And a lot of little girls in princess dresses," Thackery said.

"Is that a note of envy I detect?" Chessur asked. "You seem quite small enough now to fit into one of those dresses yourself."

Thackery's fair cheeks turned pink. "Oh, I—I—I—don't want—" he stuttered.

"Don't you?" the cat wheedled.

"I'm going to the bar!" Thackery squealed and bounced off in that direction.

"Bring me one, too, Thack!" Mally shouted, and then felt a wave of panic as he realized that he was alone with the cat.

"Oh, don't get your tail in a twist. We are in a crowded, public place and I have a lot more on my mind than taking a bite out of that nice, juicy ass of yours," Chessur purred, seeing the look on Mally's face.

"I don't have a tail any more, thanks to you!" Mally snapped, but Chess was right. He was safe enough in the crowd, and Thackery was only twenty feet away.

"Ah, memories," Chessur said, but he was staring at the stage and not at all at the Dormouse.

"Here comes our host, Faren!" Nivens said into the microphone as the dancers left the stage and the crowd cheered wildly.

"It's almost that most magical time of the night!" cried a handsome young man, also dressed in a winter outfit as he strode charismatically onto the stage. "Thank you, DJ Chill!"

"DJ Chill?" said Mally and Chessur together.

"I know you're all excited, so it's time to check the temperature!" Faren shouted. The crowd went wild, clapping and cheering their excitement. A picture of a large thermometer appeared on a screen. "What do you want to do?"

"FREEZE THE NIGHT!" the crowd hollered.

"WHAT?" Faren hollered back.

"FREEZE THE NIGHT! FREEZE THE NIGHT! FREEZE THE NIGHT!"

Thackery came back as the crowd was chanting and shoved a glowing blue drink at Mally. His own cup was more than half empty, Mally noticed.

"What's happening?" the March Hare cried.

The thermometer broke and an angry Yeti appeared on the screen in its place, roaring. Mally nearly spilled his drink, but before he got the chance, Thackery yanked it out of his hand and bolted down half, then gave him the cup back.

"It worked!" Faren cried. "C.C., it's time to LET IT GO!"

A blonde woman dressed in a blue winter coat with a poofy skirt, glittering with rhinestone snowflakes, strode out on the stage and began to sing. The nearly empty cup Thackery had given Mally slipped through his fingers and rolled away. He tried to say something to the others, but all he could do was stare at her.

It wasn't a terrible song. Her voice was lovely, and she filled the words with an emotion that threatened to bring tears to Mally's eyes. This was a song about walking away from the past and not looking back. It was heart wrenching.

It was Alice.


	8. Chapter 8

Thackery gulped down the blue drink faster than he had ever consumed an alcoholic beverage in his life, before he even walked away from the bar. Finding out that they had been replaced had caused his anxiety to skyrocket, and he hoped that the beverage would calm him down even a little. It wasn't very strong, from what he could tell, but it knocked him for a loop, giving him a buzz right away. It didn't completely calm him down, but it did help a little.

The crowd started chanting and he ran back over to Mally, trying not to spill the drinks. Tea, Mally wouldn't mind if Thack took his. They could get more later. Couldn't they? Did they have any money left? Maybe Chess would buy them a round if he asked nicely…

And then…

And then…

There was Alice.

Thackery's knees buckled. His vision swam and for half a second he thought he was going to black out. He finished the rest of his drink, barely noticing the sweet taste. The world shifted, then snapped sharply into place. He shook his head. Better. Yes.

"This is good, right?" he asked Mally.

"I…uh…"

"This is NOT GOOD, Thackery," Chessur said.

"But she's here, and we can—"

"Isn't it obvious that she's changed?" the cat asked with frustration.

"Maybe she's just…acting…" Mally suggested.

They fell silent as Alice went into the second chorus of the song, which was ridiculously catchy. Her voice pierced Thackery, as it always had. He had always loved listening to Alice sing. As the melody reached its crescendo, Alice flung her arms out and snow burst out of her fingertips. The crowd roared as she filled the sky over the stage with frosty crystals.

"I've never seen her do that before," Chessur commented. "Alice has never been very magical."

"I wonder what she had to trade for that power," Mally said in an awed tone.

"Us," Chessur said bitterly.

"Alice would never do that!" Thackery insisted.

The song came to an end, and before the three of them could act, the host called Faren hurried Alice off of the stage and into the back.

"Come on!" said Mally.

He took off in the direction of the exit from the park to the dressing rooms they had used as the Mad T Party band. Thackery ran after him and Chessur followed, grumbling to himself. By the time they made their way through the crowd, there was no sign of Alice or her escort. Thackery saw Mally disappear into the old, familiar door that led backstage. A moment later he yanked it open. A gust of bitterly cold air nearly knocked him off of his feet. He stepped inside and Chessur followed.

Thackery's mismatched eyes widened in shock as he looked around the room. The space had been expanded and redecorated. There was a snowy playground with a hill for sledding, a refreshment stand, a gift shop, and a small bandstand. The lighting was dim and the room was clearly closed for business. Mally stood there openmouthed, turning slowly in a circle. When he saw Thackery and Chessur, he waved his arms wildly.

"This isn't right!" he exclaimed.

"Hm," said Chessur, strolling over to inspect the refreshment stand. "It says they have a cheese plate."

"What? Really?" said Mally.

"Where could Alice have gone?" Thackery asked, his voice sounding plaintive even to himself. "We need to keep looking for her."

"You shouldn't have come here," came a familiar, nervous voice. "Tarrant was supposed to keep you away."

Nivens came from around the corner of the snow playground, still dressed in his winter outfit. He pulled off his knit hat and let his ears spring free. Where Thackery's usually hung down on the sides of his face, the White Rabbit's ears stood straight up. He was still wearing the sunglasses that disguised his red eyes from the humans.

"Tarrant knows about this?" Chessur asked in a low, dangerous tone. "Are you certain?"

"She gave up a lot to fetch you back from Wonderland," Nivens said, his voice quavering.

"Why doesn't she want to see us?" Thackery asked, swaying on his feet. The drinks were hitting him pretty hard, and he really wanted to sit down.

"It's for the best if you leave her alone," Nivens insisted. "I have to go. I have another DJ set. If they catch me missing it won't go well for any of us. They've warned me about being late."

"You're leaving us with more questions than answers," Chessur hissed as the Rabbit began to hurry back the way he came.

"Let it go, Chessur!" Nivens called over his shoulder as he disappeared into the darkness.

"Stop saying that," Mally whined. "That song is already stuck in my head."

"Nivens! Wait!" Thackery cried. He launched himself in the direction that Nivens had taken. "You have to tell us where she is!"

"Thackery!" Mally shouted, and the March Hare knew that both the Dormouse and the Cheshire Cat were following him. Around the corner was a door marked Cast Members Only. That had to lead backstage! Thackery hurried towards it, but before he could go through, it opened and Faren stepped out.

He was a dark haired young man dressed in a pleasant wintry outfit. He smiled at them, but the smile didn't quite reach his eyes, or even his nose. He had a presence so commanding that Thackery immediately screeched to a halt, causing Mally to slam into him and Chessur to slam into Mally. It was some sort of miracle that the three of them didn't land in a heap on the floor.

"May I help you, gentlemen?" he asked in a cool voice that told Thackery immediately that he was not there to help.

"We need to see Alice!" Mally said, his voice sounding squeakier than usual, as if something about this young man made him nervous. That wasn't good. Thackery was already nervous enough for the three of them.

"And who is Alice?" Faren asked, his expression intimating that they were all idiots.

"I believe you called her C.C.," said Chessur, stepping around Mally and Thackery. He extended a hand in greeting. "My name is—"

"I am well aware of who you are," said Faren, ignoring the gesture and dropping the fake smile. "And you may rest assured that my C.C. is not your Alice. Now, this area is closed, so if you would like to follow me, I will escort you back out into the party. I'm given to understand that you will be given your assignments in the morning, and I would hate for any misunderstandings between us to cause you to be sent home tonight. Do I make myself clear?"

"Well…" said Thackery.

"Not really," said Mally.

"Exceedingly," said Chessur. "Come along, Rodent. Thackery. Let's not irritate this kind gentleman."

"I thought you might see things my way, Kitty," Faren said in a gloating tone. "Now, if you please, out the door."


	9. Chapter 9

Mally had to help keep Thackery upright as the three of them walked out of the Freeze the Night party, into the streets of Hollywoodland, and back towards the hotel.

"You don't hold your booze well, do you, bunny?" Mally grumbled. "At least it's easier to keep you upright now that you're so tiny."

"Can we stop for just… just one more?" Thackery asked. "I think it would make me feel better... feel…better… better… better…"

"No!" Mally grumbled, conveniently forgetting all the times he had come home drunk to Thackery. "You already drank mine."

"You are simply no fun, are you, Dormouse?" Chessur said. "What if we go to the hotel bar, Thackery?"

"We are going straight to bed," Mally said before Thackery could reply. "You should do the same."

"I don't require nearly the amount of sleep that you do," Chessur smirked.

"But you're a cat!" Thackery said. "Cats sleep a lot. A lot!"

"We just let you think we're sleeping. That way you speak freely in front of us, and we learn all your secrets."

"I don't have any secrets!" Thackery said, his voice slightly slurred.

"Is that so?"

"What are you getting at, Chessur?" Mally demanded. "I don't like the turn this feta conversation is taking, and today has been unsettling enough as it is. I think we should have continued looking for Alice."

"This was not the time," Chessur said. "Trust me—"

"Never!"

Chessur sighed. "I suppose I've earned that. However, we are all on the same side in this matter. We are going to have to all work together to extract Alice from this situation."

"Do you think she needs help?" Thackery whispered. The fear and sadness in his voice made Mally shiver, and feel very protective of his husband. Mally was so used to Thackery taking care of him and protecting him that he almost wasn't sure how to do it in exchange.

"We saw her shoot snow out of her fingers," the Dormouse said reasonably. "So, yeah. She needs help."

Thackery clung to him more tightly and Mally stroked one of his long, furry teal ears, causing the Hare to shudder.

"Why didn't Tarrant tell us?" Thackery asked.

"Perhaps he doesn't know," Chessur suggested as they entered the hotel. "Well. I shall see the two of you at the meeting in the morning."

"Wait!" said Mally. "What about Absolem?"

"What about him?"

"Have you seen him? He's pretty smart—maybe he will know what to do about Alice!" Mally felt a spark of hope inside. If anybody could help, it was the Caterpillar. He was the wisest of all of them.

"No," Chessur replied. "I haven't."

"Aren't you sharing a room with him?" Thackery asked.

"No."

"You have your own room?" asked Mally.

"No."

"Then—" Thackery began, but the cat cut him off.

"If you must know, my new roommate is Tarrant. Tarrant and a thousand or so of his favorite hats." Chessur ground his teeth together as his hand balled into a fist. "I'm sure it's going to be delightful."

"But what about Alice?" Thackery said. He was starting to tremble. Mally could feel it. He did his best to steer Thack towards the elevator.

"It does not seem like she will be joining us, does it?" Chessur said crisply as they all got into the elevator. "Now if you will excuse me, I need to vanish."

As soon as the elevator doors closed, he did precisely that. Thackery jumped slightly, then let out deep breath he appeared to have been holding.

"I'm glad we're alone," said the March Hare.

"Me, too," said Mally, "Though if you're wanting to jump my bones again, I'm a bit tired."

Thackery let out a giggle, then a guffaw, then laughed so hard that he snorted. He found the snort so funny that it set him off laughing again until he snorted again and he probably would have kept the cycle up if the elevator hadn't stopped on their floor just then.

"All right, Thackery Snortwicket – off to bed with you," Mally sighed as he steered Thack down the hallway. He still had the room key in his pocket, thank provolone, and soon they were safely back in their new quarters. He helped Thackery undress and tucked him into the bed.

"Don't throw my clothes on the floor," Thackery mumbled into the pillow.

"You threw half of our wardrobe on the floor earlier."

"I picked it up." Thackery yawned widely. "I put it away."

"Fine, fine."

"Yours either. Just… just put them on the chair. Then come here and hold me, Mally. I'm looking forward to being the little spoon."

"You always were obsessed with spoons," Mally said fondly, tossing all of their clothes into a heap on the padded armchair. He slipped into the bed next to Thackery and took his husband into his arms. Mally drew in a deep breath, inhaling the Hare's natural fragrance of blackberries. "You might be shorter, but you smell just the same," Mally murmured. "You're still my Thack. You're still mine."

"And you're still mine," Thackery said, sounding half asleep already. "I'm so glad you're alive."

"Uh. Yeah. Me, too, Thack," Mally said, slightly disconcerted.

"And I'm glad you don't have to sleep in the teapot any more."

Mally frowned. "Was that where I was?"

"Yes. And your scarf, and your ring."

Mally looked down at his left hand and felt a pang of regret for having lost his wedding ring. He knew Thackery was trying to pretend that it hadn't upset him, but Mally knew better.

"I suppose it got left in Wonderland, then," he murmured.

"Underland."

"Yes…"

Mally pet Thackery's long ears very gently, hoping to stir him up a little, but Thackery Earwicket was already fast asleep.


	10. Chapter 10

Thackery couldn't have been more surprised to find that Mally had gotten up before him, made tea, and, from the sound of things, gotten into the shower. Part of him wanted to join the Dormouse under the spray of hot water, but a glance at the clock told him that would make them late for the meeting Tarrant had asked them to attend.

He took a deep breath and looked around the room. Yesterday's clothes were piled on the plush arm chair that was identical to the chair that had been in their previous room. Thackery vaguely remembered Mally helping him undress. He'd been a little drunk, but he didn't regret it – it had helped cut down the terrible, awful, looming anxiety that he felt when he thought about Alice shooting snow out of her fingertips.

Thackery reached out, took the tea that Mally had left for him on the bedside table, and sipped it slowly. It was not unpleasant, but Thackery really wished he had some of the special calming Drink Me left that Tarrant had given him. His fingers shook a little, and he forced himself to take deep breaths. Everything was going to be all right, he told himself.

The water in the bathroom shut off and a few minutes later Mally emerged wearing no more than a small towel slung around his hips. His blond hair stood up in spikes as it usually did, glittering with drops of water. Thackery tried not to gasp, but failed embarrassingly. Mally froze.

"What? What is it?"

"You… you look…beautiful."

Mally smiled slowly, his grin cocky and seductive. He sashayed towards the bed, the towel slipping a bit and drawing Thackery's eyes downwards. The Dormouse chuckled and toyed with the edge of the towel.

"Shall I take it off?"

"Yes…and put your clothes on. We have a meeting."

Mally groaned. "You're way too practical." He winked at Thackery and turned towards the wardrobe, then let the towel fall to the floor. Thackery sat there for a moment admiring the view, then forced himself to hop out of bed and barrel to the bathroom so he could take a shower as well. A cold one.

Fifteen minutes later they headed out of the room and down to the conference level. Mally reached for the door to the Violet room when they arrived, but Thackery stopped him.

"Tarrant said the Lily Room."

Mally frowned. "I don't like it," he said. "Bad things always happen when we hold our meetings in the Lily Room."

"That's… that's silly…" Thackery said, but a knot formed in the pit of his stomach because when he thought about it, it was absolutely true. Still, they hadn't any choice, so he opened the door to the Lily Room and led Mally inside.

The usual conference table laid with tea things was there, only instead of six chairs around it, there were five. Thackery's fingers began to shake and he clenched his hands into fists. Tarrant was already seated and was pouring tea into seventeen different cups despite the much smaller number of chairs. He looked up and smiled when he saw them.

"Glad to see you survived the night!" said the Hatter. "Have some tea! Thackery, yours is the fourteenth cup if you count clockwise, the eighth if your clock isn't wise, and the second to the right if you're star crossed."

"I certainly hope that we are no longer star crossed," Thackery said as he began counting the tea cups. He found the one that he thought Tarrant had indicated and picked it up, settling into the chair on the Hatter's left. Mally sat down beside him and reached eagerly for a cheese Danish.

"I thought we took attendance before tea time," Mally said, stuffing the pastry into his mouth.

"It's always tea time," Thackery and Tarrant said together. Tarrant clapped his hands in delight, which sent the teapot flying over his shoulder to smash against the wall. Luckily there were two more on the table so the Hatter simply picked up another and continued filling the rest of the cups.

Before Mally could empty his mouth enough to respond, Chessur materialized in the chair next to him. The Dormouse jumped a bit and Thackery patted his hand reassuringly. The cat was once more wearing a suit that was too big for him and hung on his now slender frame, his hair sticking up all over the place, completely lacking the slick, well-put together look he had previously always mastered. It bothered Thackery to see him this way, but there wasn't much he could say about it right now.

Chessur looked around at the many different cups of tea, picking them up here and there to sniff, then setting them back down again. Finally he settled on the creamer and lifted that to his lips instead, sipping daintily. "Where's the bug?"

"It's not like Absolem to be late," Thackery fretted. His stomach gurgled so he picked up a carrot muffin but found himself too nervous to eat it. He found himself shredding it into crumbs before Tarrant nodded at him.

"Drink your tea, Thackery. It's not like Absolem to be early, either."

"Can we just get started without him, then?" Chessur asked. "I haven't been here a minute and I'm already bored."

"I have some questions," Thackery said timidly, but Tarrant gave him a sharp look and indicated the tea cup yet again.

Sighing, Thackery picked it up and took a sip. It was the Drink Me! Eagerly he drained the entire cup, feeling a relaxing warmth spiral through him at once. It was perfect. His anxiety began to melt away and he knew he would be able to face anything then.

"I have some answers. More tea?" Tarrant asked.

"Please!"

"Do you really have answers, Tarrant?" Mally asked, now that he had finally finished his Danish.

"Or do you only have assignments?" Chessur asked suspiciously.

"Time to take attendance!" Tarrant announced. "In backwards order!"

"Why in—" Mally began but Chessur glared at him.

"Are you really asking why, Mousie?"

"Y is very near the end of the alphabet," said Tarrant, "But it turns out that we haven't anyone here whose name starts with that letter. Thackery!"

"What?"

"He's taking attendance," Chessur sighed, rolling his eyes dramatically.

"Oh! Present, then," Thackery said. He smiled and sat back in his chair. "Mally, pass me a muffin, will you."

"Are you going to eat it or play with it?" Mally grumbled, handing it over. He snagged himself another Danish in the process. When he set it on his plate Chessur reached over, stuck a finger in it, and licked it off. "Hey! Get your own snack!"

"I'd like to," Chessur said, scooting closer to Mally. "But you keep escaping." For some reason this struck Thackery as terribly funny and he began to giggle. He looked over at Tarrant, who seemed distinctly irritated.

"Not funny, Thack," Mally snapped.

"Hot cross buns," Thackery whispered. He continued chuckling to himself as the Hatter cleared his throat.

"Tarrant!" Tarrant announced.

"That's you, you idiot," Chessur grumbled

"I know," Tarrant said, sticking out his tongue and blowing a raspberry at Chessur. "And I am present."

"Not entirely," said Chessur.

"Mallymkun!"

"I'm here," Mally said, scooting his chair as far away from the cat as he could get.

"Chessur."

"I'm not entirely here either," said the cat as he began to subtly fade in and out. Normally this made Thackery very uncomfortable but today it didn't bother him so much. His lips felt slightly numb, so he nibbled on the lower one.

"Absolem."

Tarrant called the final name on the roll and Thackery knew they would probably have to sit there until the Caterpillar showed up. As if on cue, the door opened, but instead of their keyboard player stood a beautiful, dark-haired woman who was by Thackery's estimation just slightly taller than he himself was now. She had on round glasses like Absolem always wore, and dark brown jeans with a hunter green hoodie. Absolem had an outfit just like that, Thackery remembered.

"Present," said the woman.

"Good," said Tarrant. "Take a seat. Now the meeting can officially begin."


	11. Chapter 11

Mally felt the huge bite of cheese Danish he had just crammed into his mouth catch in the back of his throat. He sputtered for breath, then finally managed to spit the half-chewed pastry back onto his plate. The Dormouse swiped at his watery eyes as the beautiful woman who had just entered the room sat down between Chessur and Tarrant.

"Are you all right?" Thackery asked, patting Mally's back. He seemed concerned but also somewhat vague and dreamy. Mally shook his head, his spiky blond hair standing up even straighter.

"No, I am not all right," Mally said, pointing across the table. "She just said she was Absolem."

"Correction," said the woman, lifting a slender and well manicured finger. "I said that I am Absolem."

"Isn't this an interesting turn of events?" Chessur murmured, leaning back in his chair. The cat's smile grew excessively large and seemed to float in front of his face. It always gave Mally the creeps when he did this and now was no exception.

"It is hardly interesting at all," Absolem said, crossing her arms over her chest and drawing Mally's attention to her bountiful new charms. "Can we get on with the meeting, please, Tarrant?"

"Of course—" Tarrant began, but Mally cut him off.

"Hold on a feta minute, here," said the Dormouse, "Are we not going to talk about this?"

"What exactly do you feel needs to be said, Mallymkun?" asked Absolem, staring right at him…and cheddar if Mally didn't realize that he found her pretty provolone attractive. He glanced over at Thackery, but the March Hare was sadly staring at his empty teacup while turning it over and over in his fingers. With guilt freshly added to his confusion, Mally struggled to put his thoughts into words.

"You're a girl!"

"You're taller. Thackery is shorter. Chessur's thinner. What's the difference if I have assumed a new gender?" Absolem shrugged. "I assure you, I am exactly the same person you knew previously."

"But how did this happen?" Mally asked in bewilderment.

"Mally," Thackery said softly, "You know how it is when something happens to Alice."

"Then something happens to all of us," Chessur muttered.

"Nothing's happened to me," Tarrant said cheerfully. "Now, we must forget all of this Alice nonsense and get on with our new roles."

Mally's eyes widened. "I cannot feta believe you just said that. Tarrant, you love Alice. You were going to marry her!"

"You were going to marry Thackery," Tarrant said.

"I am married to Thackery!"

"I don't see any ring," said Chessur, grabbing Mally's hand. He bent his head and licked the finger where the ring should have been. "Mmmm."

Mally yanked his hand back. "I lost it," he said, his face flaming red as he looked at Thackery. "I'm sorry."

"Does this mean we are not married?" Thackery whispered, looking horrified.

"Unfortunately, yes," said Chessur with obviously pretend sympathy,

"Of course not," Absolem said coolly. "I married the two of you, myself. That is a binding contract. Chessur, leave Mallymkun alone. You had your chance at him, and you made poor decisions. Let him be. We have greater troubles now. Tarrant, do you know what happened to Alice?"

Tarrant's smile looked a bit more fixed, his amber eyes glowing a bit brighter and greener as he blinked slowly. "Alice is gone," he said, his voice still sounding strangely cheerful. "I would advise you all to forget about her. Also, Mallymkun, you might want to find a jacket. It's winter, you know."

"It's April," said Chessur, "In California."

"It's Alice," said Thackery, hiccupping. "We saw her shoot snow out of her fingers!"

Neither Absolem nor Tarrant seemed fazed by this information, though the Caterpillar did reach up and straighten her glasses.

"I will investigate," Absolem said. "Meanwhile, you mentioned new roles, Tarrant."

"Cinnamon," said Tarrant, lifting up the plate of pasties and offering it Absolem. "they're quite delicious."

"No blueberry muffins?" she asked, frowning slightly. "Very well. I do like cinnamon."

Absolem was even cuter when she frowned, Mally thought, and again glanced guiltily at Thackery. The March Hare had leaned back in his chair and was spinning it in a circle. His teacup was now balanced on his head. Was there something in the tea? Mally picked up the cup nearest him and took a sip, but it was just tea – didn't even have cream or sugar. He tried a few other cups but the result was the same, so he picked up the first one he had tasted and began loading it up with sugar, which was the only way a civilized person should take their tea, really. He had just gotten it to a comfortable sweetness and noticed that Chessur had drunk all the cream when he realized that they had all forgotten the purpose of the meeting.

"Are we getting the band back together?" Mally asked. "I really miss my guitar."

"Not until winter ends," Tarrant said.

"When will that be?" Chessur asked suspiciously. "When you break the spell on Alice with True Love's Kiss?"

"You said it's April," Thackery said, looking at Chessur. "Spring starts in March."

"What exactly happened in March?" Mally asked. "I seem to have missed it."

"You hibernated, and Thackery went mad," Tarrant said. "But there hasn't been a spring since Nivens had his clock stolen. That's where he keeps his springs, along with his wheels, and gears."

"Thackery—"

"We can talk about March later, Mally," Thackery said, patting his hand. His mismatched purple and green eyes widened a little, as if whatever calm he had just been floating through was draining out of him. "Tarrant, can you kiss Alice and end winter? Do you think maybe Chessur's right?"

"Right? No, Chessur's left…" Tarrant said.

Mally looked over at the cat's chair and it was empty. He felt a surge of combined relief and irritation, but then Chessur faded back into sight.

"I'm still here. I'm just getting bored," he said. "If the band isn't getting back together and you're not going to try to kiss Alice, what exactly are we doing here? I was perfectly happy back home in Underland."

"You weren't," said Tarrant, "None of us were. But that's neither here nor there. As our stage is currently, ah… frozen… we will be given other jobs by the company so we can pay for our hotel rooms and food."

"Ah, yes, good," said Absolem. "I truly did prefer working in the security department."

"Please do not tell me I have to go back to Award Wieners!" Mally snapped.

"Well, it was brought to my attention by the management that nobody here likes to have a rodent around their food," Tarrant said. "So you have been given a different assignment. In fact, all of us have been given different assignments."

"So no security, then," Absolem said, frowning her cute frown.

"Can you please tell us what the jobs are, Tarrant?" Thackery asked. His fingers were shaking.

"As we are musicians," Tarrant said grandly, "We will now be…" He paused for dramatic effect. "Musicians!"

"Why didn't anyone think of that the first time?" Mally sighed.


	12. Chapter 12

"I hear you're our new bass player," the woman said to Thackery as she strode into the small backstage greenroom where he and Chessur were waiting to meet their new band mates.

The two Underlandians stood up politely as she approached. She was beautiful – dark and slender, with curly hair, dimples and sparkling white teeth. The orange dress she wore was from the time period that the California Adventure park represented, Thackery knew, not the current style. It was a show costume, but it suited her wonderfully and he loved it. It made him want to ask her to dance.

"I'm Thackery," said the March Hare, putting his hand out in greeting. "This is Chessur."

"What a delight," the cat purred.

The woman shook Thackery's hand, then offered her fingers to Chessur, who smiled seductively and bent his lips over them. "The drummer. Aren't you a sweet baby! Well, it sure is nice to meet you both! We've been in something of a jam lately since two of our boys up and went back to Chicago in a hurry. Never did say why. Thought we were going to lose our lodgings at the park until you two turned up. I'm Dime, by the way. The rest of the gang will be here in a minute."

As she mentioned them, three dapper looking gentlemen strode into the room, talking and laughing together. Two of them were carrying horns, and the third had a guitar slung over his shoulder. He seemed to be in the middle of telling a joke.

"—so then, the one legged jockey says, don't worry about me, baby. I ride side-saddle!"

The two horn players roared with laughter. Dime frowned.

"Now, T-bone, you just watch your language in front of our new friends. You don't want to scare them off!"

"Aw, honey, they're musicians," said the guitar player, slipping his arm around Dime and giving her a friendly squeeze. "Surely they know a few bad jokes. Hello there, fellas! I'm T-bone, and this here's Clyde and Zoot. Hope you haven't fallen too hard for Dime, 'cause she's my girl."

He smiled broadly and Thackery wasn't sure if he meant it or not. Dime chuckled and gently pushed him off.

"T-bone's a big talker," she said as the three men shook hands with Thack and Chessur. "This here's Thackery and Chessur, from that Wonderland band used to play over where Freeze the Night is now. Management says they can help us out."

"You can help us out as well, I think," Chessur said. "We all seem to have what each other needs."

"Look at them ears, though," said Clyde, the trumpet player. "What are we going to do about that?"

Thackery felt his fact turn hot and his heartbeat sped up a little. This wasn't the time to start feeling anxious. He grabbed his ears and held them in front of his face, peeking through. "What's wrong with my ears?" he asked.

"Doesn't exactly fit in with the act," added Zoot, the saxophone.

"We heard you all used to work some strange magic over at that T Party," said T-bone, "But don't worry. Dime knows a little magic herself. We can fix you right up. You're both going to need a little help from wardrobe."

"Good luck hiding those," Clyde said, shaking his head.

"Before we call for wardrobe, don't you even want to see if they can play?" asked Zoot.

"We can play," said Chessur. His expression looked a little dark. Thackery knew he didn't like to be doubted. "We simply haven't been given any instruments."

"And the wardrobe's already been delivered!" Dime added. "Don't worry, Baby, the drum kit's right over here. It's the traveling kind, since we ride out to our show in our old jalopy. Might be a bit smaller than what you're used to."

Chessur inspected the drum kit, slipping it over his shoulders so it rested securely in front of him. Thackery watched. The cat seemed to be pleased with it, despite how much smaller it was than what he had had with the Mad T Party band. Chess picked up a drum stick, twirled it, then began tapping out a rhythm. A few moments later he was slaying it. The guitar player and the two horns joined in and the four of them jammed for a few minutes.

"You know what's missing?" T-bone said.

"Bass!" said Thackery. Obviously.

And then he saw it, leaning against the wall. It was old, but had clearly been taken care of. The upright bass had been well-loved, and Thackery knew it was about to be loved again. How long had it been since he had played an upright? Eagerly he went for it. He ran his hand over the curve of the instrument, sighing deeply.

"This is the beginning of a beautiful friendship," he said.

"Do you use a bow, or do you just pluck it?" T-bone asked, winking at him.

"Most of the time, I slap it," Thackery replied, winking back as he took the bass in his arms. It was almost taller than him at his new short height, but it felt just right in his embrace. He let his fingers caress the strings, then began to play.

Music flowed through him. It felt so good. Everything fell into place. He glanced at Chessur and saw that the cat was grinning almost naturally as he played. It was rare to see him genuinely enjoying himself. Dime began to sing. Thackery didn't know the song, but he had a talent for following and T-bone was a natural leader.

"Hey, Thackery you're great!" T-bone said when the music finally wound down. "You really slam that bass!"

"Then that's what we're gonna call you," Dime said, brushing her fingertips over Thack's cheek. "Slam. And this here Cheshire Cat's my new Baby." She gave Chess a little kiss on the cheek and the rest of the band groaned.

"We're gonna need a couple of rehearsals, but I think you'll do just fine," T-bone said, shaking both of their hands again.

"You go ahead and try on your new clothes, and make sure everything fits," Dime said, indicating the garment bags that had already been left for them. "We will go pick up some lunch and bring you something back. Best not to rehearse on an empty stomach."

"My dear, I don't disagree," said Chessur. "I have a taste for tuna, if you can scare some up."

"Bunch of carrots for the rabbit?" asked Clyde. He and Zoot both chuckled until Dime gave them a sharp look.

"I'm not a rabbit, I'm a hare. There's a huge difference," Thackery pointed out. "For instance—"

"For instance, nobody cares," said Chessur. "And you do love carrots."

Thackery's face turned scarlet and he reached up and tugged nervously on his ears. "A salad will be fine. Thank you."

"You got it, Slam," said Dime. "A nice salad, extra carrots. And Clyde, stop giving him a hard time. Come along, boys." She shooed the other three out of the room.

"I think this might be fun," said Chessur, looking over the garment bags. "This must be mine." It was labeled 'Chessur Katz.'

Thackery opened his bag. It contained a blue plaid suit jacket with a wide collared vest, pinstriped pants, a blue striped shirt, and a pink bowtie. He loved it instantly, and when he put it on, it fit like a glove. Chessur had a similarly plaid pants, a blue vest, green shirt, and a wide tie with a peacock on it. He also had a newsboy cap, which he looked at disdainfully for a moment before he shrugged and put it on. Everything fit him nicely, as opposed to the suit he had been wearing.

"You look good," Thackery said.

"Don't I now? Very well," Chessur purred, then he handed Thackery a fedora. "Good luck getting your ears up in this."


	13. Chapter 13

As Mally followed Absolem through Disneyland park, he caught himself trailing slightly in back of the caterpillar. It was partially because Absolem knew where they were going, but if Mally was completely honest with himself, part of the reason he was lagging behind was, well, to look at her behind.

"I believe we pass the tiger, but not the tree and then the lair should be to the right," Absolem said without turning to look back at Mally.

"Uh huh," Mally said agreeably, even though he had no idea where Absolem meant them to go. "Hey, Absolem, what does it feel like?"

Absolem stopped walking, then turned around to face Mally. She frowned and Mally stared at her pouty little red lips. "What does what feel like?"

"Being a girl."

"That is a ridiculous question, Mallymkun. Now, please stop staring. I don't think Thackery would appreciate the way you're looking at me."

The stern look that she gave him caused a hot blush to fan over the Dormouse's cheeks. She was right, it wasn't fair to Thackery at all, but he couldn't help how he felt when he looked at her. Mally took a deep breath.

"Sorry. You're just so provolone different, and cheddar beautiful, and—"

"I am exactly the same," Absolem said, sounding even more irritated. "Female characteristics aside. Frankly, as you enjoy both genders, there's no reason for you to be attracted to me now, as a female, since you were not attracted to me when I was male. I'm simply a novelty, and novelty is something you have always had difficulty resisting for as long as I've known you. So, get yourself under control. We have more than enough problems at the moment and I don't need you adding to them."

Mally grinned and shook his head. She was right, he was being an idiot. His face still felt hot, and he ran a hand through his blond hair. But cheddar. He did really used to enjoy women, before he had fallen in love with Thackery, and Absolem had turned into quite an amazing specimen.

"Sweet cheese—" he started, but the caterpillar raised her hand in a stop gesture and looked at him with steely eyes.

"If you continue in that vein I am going to punch you," she said calmly. "Now, we have to meet up with our new band mates. Can you pull yourself together?"

Mally blinked. He couldn't imagine Absolem punching anyone, whether the caterpillar was male or female, but she did not seem to be kidding. He nodded slowly and she set her mouth in a thin line.

"Good. Now. Come on."

Absolem pushed open a door that blended nicely into the wall. They headed backstage, through a typical alley full of garbage cans and posters about safety, nothing much different than some of the areas Mally had encountered backstage at California Adventure. Behind the scenes was never as pretty as people thought. They wound through the trash, then up a thin set of wooden stairs to a particularly dilapidated door. It hung loosely on its hinges, and from within Mally caught a few notes played plaintively on an acoustic guitar.

He stepped closer to listen, but somehow managed to trip over his own feet. Absolem lifted a hand to catch him, but didn't make it before Mally pitched into the door, knocking it open and falling to the floor in a heap in front of a rag tag group of musicians who dropped their instruments and pointed an assortment of pistols and swords at him before he could blink. He lifted his hands up, a gesture of surrender, his heart pounding rapidly in his chest.

To Mally's surprise Absolem stepped over him to stand in front of him, shielding him from the weapons.

"We mean you no harm," she said. "Forgive my idiotic companion. We were sent to play music with you."

The group looked back and forth at each other, then down at Mally. After a moment, they all began to laugh, until finally they lowered their weapons and the man who was apparently the leader stepped forward. He offered Mally a hand, then hauled the Dormouse to his feet, not an easy task as Mally was a fair bit taller than him. This reminded Mally how much taller he had recently become, a fact which made him grin. The stranger took the grin for a welcome and grinned back.

"Welcome to the headquarters of the World Famous Bootstrappers," he said. "The two of you don't look much like pirates, but if you're up for a bit of fun and can carry a tune, you'll fit in. Name's Mathison."

"I'm Mally. I play guitar," Mally said. "And Absolem is a piano player."

"Very good, very good—mandolin and squeezebox it is. Pass 'em up, boys."

"We're not all boys here," grumbled a lady pirate who shoved cups at Mally and Absolem before the instruments could be delivered. "Certainly not her. What was your name, dearie? Absowhat? Nevermind, Abby's good enough. Drink up!"

"What is this?" Mally asked, even though his nose was already telling him.

"Rum!"

"I don't think we can drink if we're working," Mally hedged, though he licked his lips.

"Don't be rude, Mallymkun," said Absolem. She accepted the cup and knocked back the drink. Mally's blue eyes widened, but he wasn't about to be outdone by the Caterpillar. He knocked back his own. It was rough and foul, but he managed it without choking. How spoiled he had become by the sweet mixed cocktails that they served in the parks. The pirates cheered and several more drinks were poured before the musical instruments were finally handed over.

"Time for your audition," said Mathison.

Mally dizzily strummed the mandolin. It came to life in his hands, despite the hot buzz of alcohol in his veins. It felt good, and he had no trouble making it sing. He looked over at Absolem and saw her holding the strangest instrument he'd ever encountered.

"What exactly is that?" he said, his voice squeakier than he would have liked. The pirates laughed as they set down their cups and picked up their instruments.

"Stretchable sideways piano," Absolem said seriously. She played a few notes as she experimented with the strange contraption. It sounded tuneful enough.

"Are you drunk?" Mally whispered loudly at her in a slurred tone, earning more laughter from the assembled crew.

"Certainly not," Absolem replied, straightening her glasses. "I only had four cups of rum. Come on now. Play your small guitar."

"My guitar isn't small!" Mally said. "This is a mandolin But I don't know any pirate songs."

"We'll teach you some," said Mathison, winking broadly at him. "And we'll fetch you something more suitable to wear as well." He nodded at one of the other pirates, who ran off to fetch a large trunk that was in the corner.

"We're supposed to wear rags?" Mally squeaked as the drunk was opened. Absolem was shuffled off by the lady pirates to change, disappointing him slightly. He would have liked to have seen that, especially now that he was feeling so good.

"This is finery!" said one of the pirates whose clothing had surely seen better days. "Yer getting' the fancy new stuff."

The Dormouse struggled into a pair of pants that seemed way too short, tall socks the color of Thackery's ears, and clunky buckled shoes. He like the shirt they gave him all right. It reminded him of something Tarrant would have liked, but with far less lace. There was a sash to tie around his waist and a loose vest.

"You need a hat," Mathison commented, looking him over.

Mally peered into the trunk and pulled out a colorful pink stocking cap. He started to put it on, but Mathison held up a hand in warning.

"Maybe not that one."


	14. Chapter 14

"Are you going to keep that hat on?"

Thackery looked over at the Cheshire Cat. He was surprised that Chessur had decided to accompany him over to the Disneyland park once they had finished their rehearsal with Dime and the others. He put his hand up and touched the brim of the fedora he was wearing. T-bone had said Dime knew magic, and he was right.

The beautiful singer had managed to tuck Thackery's ears and long hair up under the fedora somehow. When he looked in the mirror backstage, they seemed to have disappeared completely. He had a new, short haircut and small human ears. Yet when he tried to touch them, all he could catch between his fingers was the brim of the hat.

For a moment, Thackery remembered how he had felt when Dime's long, cool fingers had slid over his fur. His face turned red and he began to tremble. Surely allowing any pleasure in that was a betrayal of Mallymkun…but if Thack was honest with himself, he had to admit that he had liked it.

"It's kind of nice to hide my ears," the March Hare muttered. "I get less strange looks from the guests. I'm surprised you changed out of your new outfit and back into…" He waved his hand at Chessur's baggy suit and the cat frowned, causing a twinge of anxiety deep inside Thack.

"First of all, that is a stage costume, and you know we are not supposed to wear those to traipse all over the park," Chessur replied arrogantly. "Or maybe you don't." He nodded at the hat. "Second of all, plaid pants are not my style."

"I thought they suited you…"

"That's a dubious compliment, bunny. In any event, I shall acquire some better fitting clothing shortly so don't worry your pretty little head about it." The cat languidly lifted his hand and faked a yawn.

They passed through the turnstiles and under the train tracks, stepping into the magical little kingdom that had always delighted Thackery. He felt a pulse of warmth in his heart, and his anxiety briefly melted away. Slowly he began to walk down Main Street, taking in the nostalgic surroundings and trying not to be put off by the jostling crowd in the street.

"I told Mally I would meet him at the bakery when his shift is over—" Thackery began, but a rush of noise and a flurry of motion caused him to jump backwards as a long bicycle with four riders barreled past. "Tea! Was that Tarrant?"

Chessur began to grin. He headed across the street towards the bicycle, which had screeched to a halt near the Refreshment Corner. Thackery hurried after him, watching the men disembark, three of them looking somewhat discombobulated and one looking absolutely delighted.

It was Tarrant all right.

"Well!" The Mad Hatter crowded. "That ride was quite frabjous, but now it is time to sing!" He looked eagerly at his companions, all three of whom were glaring at him. One of them fished a pitch pipe out of his vest and blew it a bit harshly.

"Speaking of stage costumes…" Chessur drawled as he snickered at the group.

Thackery had seen these fellows singing before and knew they were called the Dapper Dans. They wore brightly colored pants with matching striped vests, white long sleeved shirts with a matching color arm garter, and straw boater hats with a matching colored band. One of the gentlemen wore blue, one wore red, one wore purple… and then there was Tarrant. Thackery knew he should have been in a yellow outfit that matched the others, and the Hatter indeed wore the bright yellow pants that went with that ensemble. However, he also had a green striped vest, an orange arm garter, and a lavender hat band.

The group hummed for a moment, and then began singing together harmoniously. At first Tarrant seemed to fit in well vocally, but the other singers continued to look at him sharply. The Mad Hatter seemed to take this as a cue to sing louder, until he was nearly crowing at the top of his lungs. The guests who had gathered to watch stared at him openmouthed. Thackery cringed in embarrassment, but Chessur was chuckling quietly. When the song mercifully ended, Tarrant bowed dramatically, despite the weak applause from the crowd.

"And now," he announced, "It is time for us to Un-arrive. Which means—"

"GET BACK ON THE BIKE!" shouted the Dapper Dan dressed in blue.

"Do we have to?" Dapper Red demanded of Dapper Purple, who shrugged, then nodded sorrowfully.

Tarrant leapt into the front spot on the bike, honking the horn joyfully and unceasingly as the others wearily joined him. They careened off, narrowly missing a stroller and a horse-drawn trolley and more pedestrians than Thackery could count.

"Shall we take a bet on how long that will last?" Chessur asked in a sly tone.

"What I want to know is how come we had to spend all day rehearsing and he is already singing in the park," Thackery said, tilting his head and frowning.

"You call that singing?"

"I… uh… well, he… I mean we know he can sing pretty well, since he always sings with us… or did… and…" Thackery trailed off as he saw Mally and Absolem come out of Adventureland, heading towards them.

It was hard to get used to seeing the Caterpillar as a woman. If he thought about it hard enough, Thackery could still see some of the features of his old friend in her, but it was difficult. The expressions she used had not changed with her gender, however, and she seemed as cool, calm, and collected as ever. Mally seemed to be chattering away at her and she seemed to be ignoring him completely. She raised an arched eyebrow as she caught sight of Thackery and Chessur, but that was the only change in her demeanor.

"…I still say that was a lot of fun, and the new songs we learned are so good, and you look fantastic in—"

"I have asked you to cease commenting on what I look like, Mallymkun," Absolem replied. "Yes, we had an enjoyable day, but I would have preferred returning to my position as a security guard. Now, say hello to your husband, who is eagerly waiting for you."

Mally looked over at them and frowned. "Chessur is NOT my husband!"

"I meant Thackery, you blond imbecile!"

"Thackery's not even…" Mally trailed off and his mouth dropped open. He balled his hands into fists and rubbed his ears, then blinked. "Provolone…" he finally muttered. "What—what happened to your ears?"

"Nothing happened to my—"

"It's one thing for you to be shorter than me, but you HAVE TO HAVE THOSE EARS!" Mally shouted as he grabbed the fedora from Thackery's head.

"Ow! Don't yank!" Thackery exclaimed as his long hair and long ears flopped out of the hat and down around his cheeks.

"Thank gouda! They're still there!"

"Of course they're still there," Thack grumbled, but Mally's expression had already begun to tease his bad mood away. "It's just the hat."

Mally looked down at the fedora, the brim of which was still crumpled in his fist. "Why would you cover them up?"

"I had to, for work," Thackery said. "I'm—I'm sorry!" He bit his bottom lip as anxiety flooded threw him. Grabbing his ears, he tugged them over his face, fighting for breath.

"He asked me the same thing about these," said Absolem to Chessur, pointing at her chest.

"And what did you tell him?" the Cat asked, grinning widely.

"The same thing," she replied, then turned and started walking back down Main Street towards the park exit.


	15. Chapter 15

Back in their hotel room, Mally turned Thackery's new hat over and over in his hands. He couldn't see anything special about it, nor could he fathom how it had not only hidden Thack's ears and long hair, but made him appear to have human ears as well. Shrugging, he tossed it aside as Thackery came out of the bathroom.

Mally's heart skipped a beat as he looked at his handsome husband. "Feta, Thack, I'm so glad we're back here in California."

Thackery smiled as he bounced over the bed and kissed Mally's nose. "Me, too. I missed you so much… even though you were right there with me." A strange, sad expression passed over the March Hare's face and he started to tremble. He plunked down on the bed next to Mally and the Dormouse immediately put his arms around him.

"Are you okay?"

"I don't know," Thackery murmured. "I have a lot on my mind."

"Like what?"

"Alice, mostly. The new gig I'm doing with Chessur. You, I worry about you…"

Mally took Thackery's hand in his own. "I'm fine, Thack. Really. I'm fine."

"I…I… Maybe I just need some tea."

"I'll make you some."

"N-no…Tarrant will…that is, he said…I…uh… I need to meet Tarrant downstairs in the bar at eight o'clock, which is in a few minutes."

Mally arched an eyebrow. "That sounds vaguely suspicious, Thack."

The March Hare's cheeks turned pink. "Does it?" he asked, his voice slightly high pitched.

Mally nodded. He reached up and began to pet one of Thackery's ears very gently. If he did it right, it would calm the hare down. If he did it wrong he would turn the hare on. Not that that was wrong. This just wasn't the time for it. Or was it? Mally scratched slightly and Thackery whimpered and kicked his foot reflexively. Mally grinned to himself. "Tell me what is going on," he murmured, kissing the edge of Thack's ear.

Thackery took a deep, shuddering breath. "You don't really remember what it was like back in Tulgey this time. You slept through it. I had to protect you from Chess. It was always tea time, but it was never quite right without you, without Alice. I just… my madness… it was overwhelming. So Tarrant made me a Drink Me, to go in the tea. It…it helped."

"Okay," Mally wasn't quite sure he understood, but he was infinitely grateful that Thackery had been there to protect him from the cat.

"There just… isn't any left…"

"Any what left? Tea?"

"Of the Drink Me! And I… I'm having trouble dealing with… all of this."

Mally clutched Thackery tighter and kept petting him as soothingly as he could. "It's all right now," he promised. "It is going to be fine. We're here, and we are together, and we will find a way to help Alice. In fact, we should go to the park right now and see her show! Maybe we can talk to her."

"No, Mally! You heard what Nivens said, and that… that guy, Faren. We could get sent back! I won't lose you again!" Thackery began shaking so violently that Mally almost had to let go.

"Shhh… shh… Thack! Thack! It's okay, we will go see Tarrant in the bar. Maybe he has some ideas. We have to get Alice back."

"I'm afraid Tarrant's given up on her."

"Well, then WE can't. Come on. It will be okay. I promise," Mally whispered.

"How can you promise that?" Thackery asked, his voice raw and emotional.

Mally didn't have an answer for that, but he was determined to make it so. "Come on. You wanted to go see Tarrant. We will go see him. After that maybe we can talk to Absolem. He—uh, she, usually has a lot of good ideas."

Thackery hiccupped, then nodded. "All right," he whispered, but then drew in a deep breath. "All right. Let's go."

The March Hare was silent as the two of them left the room and headed down the hall to the elevator. This made Mally fidgety, though he tried not to show it. At least it was a short trip to the bar, and when they arrived they saw that not only was Tarrant there, he was behind it with a rather skeptical looking bartender. Chessur and Absolem were sitting in front of him with untouched glasses of something dark and murky looking.

Absolem was wearing brown pants and a turquoise sweatshirt with the hood up, framing her face and dark hair. Her eyes seemed bright behind her round glasses, and the sweatshirt was tight in the front, drawing Mally's eyes there immediately. She cleared her throat as he saw her glaring at him as they approached. He shifted his eyes to Chessur and immediately felt uncomfortable. The hungry way that the cat was looking at him with half-closed eyes and tilted head made Mally all too aware of how wrong it was to look that same way at Absolem. Luckily Thackery didn't seem to notice as he was bouncing nervously towards Tarrant. The Hatter was dressed in one of his loud colored outfits featuring a polka dotted shirt with a huge scarf matching attached to the front like a cravat, skin tight yellow pants, and of course, his favorite hat.

"Do you have it? Were you able to get more?" Thackery demanded.

"No," said Tarrant, sighing dramatically. "Management is being awfully stingy about what I can take in and out of Underland these days, so I am going to concoct a suitable alternative from what we have here behind the bar."

"Technically you should not even be behind the bar!" said the exasperated bartender.

"Don't worry," Tarrant said, tipping his large teal hat at him. "I'm a professional."

"I'm going to be keeping an eye on you, and you'll have to pay for everything you drink."

"No worries, my good man," Chessur said in a smooth tone. He passed a folded bill across the bar and the bartender took it.

"You used to be a better tipper," he grumbled, stuffing the money in his pocket and heading down to the other end of the bar where other guests were waiting.

"Come sit on my knee, mousie, whilst Tarrant intoxicates your bunny," Chessur said, patting his leg.

"You wish," Mally said, glaring at him. He glanced at Thackery, but the hare was distracted by the various liquors that Tarrant was pouring into a glass for him. Thack picked it up and sniffed it nervously, his nose wrinkling.

"Are you sure this is good?" he asked Tarrant dubiously.

"I'm sure that it's not," Absolem said wryly.

"Well, let's have a toast, then," said Chessur. He picked up his own glass and nodded at Absolem, who sighed and lifted her own.

"I don't have a drink," Mally pointed out.

"Then you must enjoy some Invisibili-tea with me," said Tarrant, miming handing Mally a cup. Knowing it was more trouble than it was worth not to acknowledge this, Mally pretended to take it and lift it up. "To the March Hare! May he regain his Muchness."

Thackery lifted the glass to his lips and sucked the drink down. He immediately began sputtering and coughing. Mally whacked him on the back. Absolem set her glass down untouched, and Chessur sipped his slowly.

Once Thackery pulled himself together and wiped his watery eyes, a look of calm stole over him. His whole body seemed to relax and for this Mally felt an overwhelming sense of relief.

"Okay!" Thackery announced, holding up a finger. "Let's go to the park!"


	16. Chapter 16

Thackery's vision was blurred as he wove his way from the bar towards the park. In the back of his head, he knew he was drunk. It probably wasn't good, but there was a glorious freedom from his anxiety and almost a joy that he felt in this moment. The cool night air played over his hair and ears and he was filled with relief.

"Thaaack!"

Mally was yelling his name, but Thackery didn't slow down or stop bouncing giddily towards Hollywoodland. Mally was with Tarrant and Absolem, and he was bigger than Chess. He was safe. Thackery could breathe. He didn't need to worry about the Dormouse every second.

What about Alice? A little voice whispered in the back of his mind, threatening his wild peace.

"Going to Alice now," he muttered determinedly, his hands balling into fists. "I will rescue her myself, if Tarrant won't! She is my best friend!"

When he reached the Rabbit Hole… or the gate that had once been called this… Thackery skidded to a stop. He sucked in a deep breath, his heart pounding. He fought the crack in his armor, the pinch of his anxiety. Was he sobering up? Maybe he needed another drink. He jammed his hands into the pockets of his jacket, but he didn't have any money.

Thackery peered through the gateway, looking for signs of snow, or of Alice. He forced his feet to move, his heart continuing to drum in his chest as he walked slowly towards the stage. Nivens was in place, wearing his winter hat and playing music that hadn't changed much since they had been gone. Thackery tried to catch the White Rabbit's eye, but Nivens studiously ignored him.

He wandered around to the back of the stage, the music pulsing through him, making him miss his electric bass. He was already deeply in love with the new bass he would be playing with Dime and the boys, but there had been something special about that magical red one. Thackery knew, strangely, that he could be happy in the new band…and so could Chessur, who rarely seemed happy. Yet, he longed for the past. He longed to be up there on this stage, with Mally and Tarrant.

And Alice…

Before he knew it, Thackery was at the door that led inside to the snow playground. It was closed for the night, and he gasped for breath as he laid a hand on the door. She was in there somewhere. Maybe if he had one more drink, he would have the nerve to go inside. Just one more… how many had he had at the hotel? He remembered bolting down the one Tarrant had made him, and the one Absolem had not touched, and maybe part of Chessur's…

Before he could bring himself to do it, the door opened, and there she was.

Alice was dressed in the same blue winter outfit she had been wearing last night, with the white knit headband around her glorious blonde hair, which seemed exceptionally curly. She looked as perfect and beautiful as always, and she smiled warmly at him but without any hint of recognition.

"It's me, Thackery!" the March Hare said with excitement. "We're back! You must have brought us here! But Faren told us not to talk to you, and Tarrant…Tarrant…"

The smile on her face wavered slightly. "Hello," she said. "I don't think we've met before, but any friend of Faren is a friend of mine. I can't imagine he would ask anyone not to talk to me." She laughed, and the sound was so dear to him and so nearly forgotten that Thackery fought not to collapse under the weight of his emotions.

"You don't remember me?"

"Surely I'd remember these," she said, reaching out to touch one of his ears. It was like an electric shock. He jumped backwards. "Were you wearing them when we met?"

"Alice! They—"

"Oh, I'm not Alice. My name is Celia, but you can call me C.C. Everyone does."

"Celia…"

"Yes."

"Celia is an anagram of Alice!" Thackery exclaimed excitedly. He grabbed her hand. Alice's fingers were ice cold, and a small burst of snow exploded from the tips, creating a short flurry in the air between them. Blushing, she pulled her fingers back. "How do you do that?" he whispered.

Their eyes locked together, and he thought he saw a flash of fear in hers, those blue eyes that he knew so well, that he had known forever. Was there a flash of recognition as well? He couldn't be sure, but Thackery felt sobriety and anxiety swoop in. The clarity was painful and blinding.

"It just happens, sometimes when I will it, sometimes when I don't," Alice said softly, looking at her fingertips. "Listen, Thackery, you seem really nice but I really don't remember you. It's time for me to sing now, if you want to watch. And… I do hope I see you again." She smiled vaguely then walked away before he could reply.

A familiar creak warned him that the door she had emerged from was opening again, and Thackery jumped backwards, nearly falling into a bush. Faren emerged, but mercifully the young man did not look in Thackery's direction. He followed Alice towards the stage. Afraid of being seen, Thackery circled around the back of the stage and nearly collided with Chessur.

"Did you talk to her?" the Cheshire Cat demanded as the crowd began to chant.

"FREEZE THE NIGHT! FREEZE THE NIGHT!"

"I tried," Thackery said. "She said she's not Alice."

"She's been Not Alice before, and she always is Alice eventually," the Cat insisted.

Thackery began to look around as his anxiety rose. "Where's Mally?"

"He stayed at the hotel with Absolem and Tarrant. They refused to come after you, and he refused to go anywhere with me."

"Can you blame him?"

Chessur smiled wickedly. "Not at all. He's well aware that I still find him… delicious. I certainly would not mind getting him alone in a dark corner—"

"Like tea you will!" Thackery raised a fist, but Chessur grabbed his arm.

"If you strike me, we will both be evicted from the park," Chessur warned.

"How dare you speak like that about my husband!"

"I dare whatever I please. Now, calm yourself. Would you like another… drink?"

Thackery blinked and felt his anger and his will-power melt away. He nodded. "I… I would like another drink."

Chessur steered him towards the bar as Alice's voice cascaded over them, singing what had apparently become an anthem to the park guests. Was it good advice? Should he let go, himself? Thackery's head was swimming and he let Chessur ply him with one, then two sticky blue drinks as Alice sang and filled the air with magical snow. The sweet concoctions contained the light-up ice cubes that had always been in the drinks at the Mad T Party. He licked them clean, then stuck them in his jacket pocket, still glowing softly. When the song ended, he looked at Chessur for guidance.

"You're a mess," the cat commented casually.

"Yes, thank you for that. But should we talk to Alice?"

"This doesn't seem to be the opportune moment," Chessur sighed.

"Why not?" Thackery demanded.

"Because here comes Faren, and he does not look particularly delighted to see us…"


	17. Chapter 17

"I should have gone after him," Mally said plaintively. Tarrant poured another shot of purple liquor into the glass in front of him, and Mally picked it up and knocked it back.

"Who?" the Mad Hatter asked.

"Thackery! Who else!"

"Six," said Absolem, sounding both annoyed and bored at once. She, too, had a glass of purple liquor in front of her, but made no move to touch it.

"Chessur would have been delighted for you to accompany him," Tarrant said, smiling wickedly as he refilled the glass again.

"I bet," Mally said, knocking it back.

"Seven," said Absolem.

"Drink yours," Tarrant insisted to her.

"I would rather not. It tastes awful and it does me no good," she replied. "Here, Mallymkun. You seem to be enjoying these. Against my better judgment, I will give you mine."

Mally shrugged and took the shot, then watched as Tarrant filled up both glasses again. "Why is it against your better judgment?"

"Eight," said Absolem. "Your tolerance for alcohol appears to have increased now that you are taller. However, you do realize that becoming intoxicated will make it easier for Chessur to take advantage of you."

"Absolem," said Tarrant seriously, "If Mally wanted Chessur to take advantage of him, he would have gone with him." He turned his gaze on the Dormouse, the wicked smile even bigger. "He seems to have a taste for you…and wants to get a taste of you. Very flattering, I'm sure." Tarrant reached out one finger and stroked it down the curve of Mally's cheek. "Almost can't blame him. There is something rather enticing about you. I can't quite put my finger on what it is…"

Mally jerked back and almost fell off the stool, scowling. "Will you guys stop? Thackery ran out of here even more drunk than I am now, and nobody said anything to him! And Tarrant, I want Chessur to leave me the feta alone! I have no desire to die, thank you provolone much."

"Calm down," said Absolem. "No one is going to kill you."

"Except maybe Chessur," Tarrant added helpfully.

"Maybe," Absolem conceded. "But only if you continue to behave like an idiot. I also think you ought to be concerned about Thackery's alcohol intake as well. He is not used to it the way you are."

Mally frowned, wondering if she was right. "He said it helped him feel less anxious."

"It does," said Tarrant. "Of course, there may be one or two negative effects, but in general, it's perfectly good for him!"

"It is not good for any of us," Absolem insisted woodenly.

"Is that why you only had…"

"I had four, mostly just to be polite."

"You do have wonderful manners!" Tarrant sighed.

"How the feta do you not feel anything after four drinks?" Mally demanded. He got off the stool and stood up, which made him feel the full effect of all the alcohol he had consumed. He swayed a bit dizzily, closing his eyes while he attempted to steady himself.

"Simple," Absolem said. She got off her stool and stood next to him, reminding Mally how much taller he was and how much shorter she and Thackery had become. "Human liquor has no effect on my species. After all, you are a mammal and I am an insect."

"You look like a mammal," Mally smirked.

"Stop staring at my breasts. I'm going up to my room to enjoy my hookah. Alone." She glared at both of them.

"Frabjous!" said Tarrant. "We will come with you!"

"Sounds good to me," said Mally as Tarrant came around the bar and slipped his arm through Absolem's.

She tried to pull away, but Tarrant had always been hard to shake off. Mally tried to get to her other side, but the Mad Hatter was too quick and grabbed on to Mally as well. As Tarrant began steering them out of the bar, Mally could hear the bartender yelling for them to sign the bill.

"Bill is a Lizard!" Tarrant sang as he dragged them into the elevator. "He's also a fairly decent guitar player," he told Mally confidentially.

"I'm a pretty decent guitar player!" Mally snapped.

"You are actually an excellent guitar player," Absolem said. "Far better than Bill the Lizard. You really ought to keep that in mind, Tarrant, and stop making deals with Chessur. And let go of me."

"What kind of deals have you been making with Chessur?" Mally squeaked. "Did it involve giving me eight drinks?"

"Nine," Absolem corrected. "I asked you to let go of me, Tarrant."

The elevator doors slid closed and Tarrant let go of Absolem apparently just so he could push all of the buttons. Once all the lights were glowing, the Hatter sighed contentedly. He continued to keep his other arm entwined with Mally's, and the Dormouse began to wonder if he ought to pull away.

"You are going to like the latest deal I have made with him," Tarrant said to Absolem. "I have a gift for you."

"There is nothing that I require," Absolem said.

The door opened on their floor and she began striding rapidly down the hallway. Mally nearly tripped as Tarrant dragged him after her, and he didn't fail to notice the pleasant sway of her round behind in the pants which had obviously been designed for a male figure.

"I just want to make it absolutely feta, provolone clear that I want nothing to do with Chessur!" Mally said. "Tarrant! Are you listening to me?"

"It's hard not to when you're shouting!" Tarrant replied in a sing-song tone.

"I should have gone after Thackery," Mally said, true regret pulling at his insides. Or was that all the booze? "YOU should have gone after Alice!"

"I don't know what you're talking abooooooooout!" Tarrant sang as Absolem opened the door to her room and tried to close it in their faces.

Tarrant stuck one long foot in the door and jammed it open, then dragged Mally inside. The Hatter spun around and finally let go of the Dormouse. Mally went flying straight into Absolem. Trying to catch his balance, he accidentally caught a handful of her bounteous charms. The Caterpillar slapped him so hard that he fell onto the bed, where he lay panting and dazed.

"I think I'm going to throw up," Mally groaned.

"Then do it in the bathroom," said Absolem.

Mally blinked and looked around the room, trying to spot the entrance to the lavatory, just in case. It was identical to the room he shared with Thackery, aside from containing a small collection of hookahs in various sizes. "Hey. You only have one bed."

"She only needs one bed," said Tarrant. He took off his top hat and started fishing around inside. Mally's stomach growled, the nausea passed, and he hoped that Tarrant would pull out a tray of scones. "She doesn't have a roommate."

"Technically I don't need even one bed," Absolem said, indicating a cocoon that was slung in one corner. "I sleep in there. However, it is a relaxing place to sit and smoke, which is what I am going to do now. Move over, Mallymkun. And sit up. And keep your hands to yourself."

Mally didn't move as she looked at her hookahs for a long moment, then finally selected one. Tarrant finally pulled his hand out of his hat.

"There it is!" he said, handing the small bag to Absolem. "From Chessur, for your hookah."

"What is it?" Absolem asked, taking the packet and examining it suspiciously.

"His special party time catnip," Tarrant said conspiratorially. Mally began to laugh.

"Ha ha ha ha ha… she isn't going to smoke that, Tarrant!"

"Actually," Absolem said, looking intrigued. "I will."


	18. Chapter 18

"I told you to stay away," Faren said as snow fell down around them. "Why didn't you listen?"

"We did listen," Thackery said, "Except, how can you expect us to stay away when—"

"When I asked them to meet me here," a smooth, feminine voice interrupted. It was Dime, wrapped up in a calf-length camel colored coat that looked as fuzzy as Thackery's ears. If he hadn't been drunk, confused, and anxious, he would have wanted to touch the fabric.

"Yes, that's right," said Chessur. "I'm so glad that you're right on time, Miss Dime, to explain to the gentleman that you were simply going to show us… ah…"

"How to get backstage to the bands' quarters," Dime filled in.

"The what?" said Thackery. His heart was beating so fast that he could barely focus. He felt as though he might pass out.

"You remember, Slam," Dime said, keeping her tone even. "Sometimes we rehearse real late and have to stay over in the park. I have a room for that."

"And you couldn't have given them a map?" Faren asked icily.

"We Wonderlandians are terrible at reading maps, I'm afraid," said Chessur. "I, myself, have other ways to travel, but those are not available to all. It seemed an easy meeting place, so I do hope you will forgive us for intruding on your party… it is such a lovely area after all."

"Indeed," Faren replied.

He glanced over his shoulder at the stage. Alice had come down into the crowd and was playing a game with all the little girls in their princess dresses. A lump formed in Thackery's throat and he wanted so badly to go to her. She looked up, as if she could sense this, and smiled.

"Thank you, Faren, for being so understanding," Dime said, laying a hand on the young man's arm. Thackery ripped his gaze away from Alice and saw Faren smiling at Dime. She was clearly more welcome than he and Chessur.

"Of course, my darling," Faren said. "How could you have known? I trust you understand that I don't want these mad folk bothering C.C. – she has such a delicate constitution, you know."

"Oh I know, I know," said Dime. She slipped one arm through Thackery's and the other through Chessur's. "You can trust me to look after Slam and Baby. Why, they're nothing but a couple of sweethearts. Maybe in time you'll see that and let them come to your nice parties. And don't worry, sir, T-bone will be by with that money we owe you later tonight."

"I trust that he will be, Dime," said Faren. "So much talk of trust tonight…even when you know that mine often runs out with my patience."

"I don't want to test either one," Dime said, smiling brightly. "You have a good night. Now, let's go, boys!"

"Good night," Chessur said politely to Faren, but the young man did not reply.

Dime steered them towards the exit that led out towards the Tower of Terror. Thackery stumbled, but managed to keep his feet as he clung to her. They rounded the corner out of sight of Faren and Alice before she stopped and looked at the two of them sternly, releasing her grip on them.

"I don't think the two of you know who you are messing with," she said. "That guy is the devil himself. He's the meanest, most dangerous, most low down person in this entire park."

Chessur frowned. "I beg to differ!"

"You may be a bad kitty, you may not. I can't say just yet—"

"He is," Thackery mumbled.

"—but you're not half as bad as Faren."

"What makes you say that?" Chessur asked.

"It's not safe to talk here," Dime said, looking around frantically. "Come on. I'll take you where I said I was taking you."

She began walking down the street at a sharp pace and Thackery weaved after her. He hated that he now had only the bad effects of the alcohol and none of the release from his anxiety. How could they leave Alice with the meanest, most dangerous, most low down person in the entire park? She couldn't possibly be safe.

Around the corner, Dime yanked open a door. Thackery blinked. He had thought the building was only a façade, and he had never been inside. Cautiously he followed her in, Chessur behind him.

"I didn't know this was here," said Chessur as they ascended a narrow staircase. Dime opened a door at the top and revealed a small yet elegant apartment. It was furnished in a style that seemed to stay with the 1920's feel of the theme park. The main room had a sofa and a loveseat in pale blue velvet, a glass coffee table, a small bar, and art deco light fixtures.

"Have a seat," Dime said as she took off her coat and put it away into a tiny closet. "Can I get you a drink?"

"Nothing for me, thank you," said Chessur as he made himself comfortable on the love seat. His eyes slipped half closed as he watched Dime go to the bar and pour herself a glass of bourbon. "But I think Thackery would like one of those. Sit down, bunny, before you fall down."

Numbly, Thack weaved his way to the sofa and plopped down, and a moment later Dime joined him, handing him a large glass of whiskey. He took a sip, then a gulp. The heat of the liquor burned into him and he felt better. She took the glass out of his hands and set it on a coaster on the table, next to her own, then took both his hands in hers.

"Are you all right, Slam?" she asked, worry in her soft voice. All Thackery could do was shake his head.

"Tell us about Faren," Chessur urged.

"Somebody up high in the company likes him a whole lot," Dime said. "He has control over every show in this park. We play ball with him, or we get sent away. That's how I lost my last drummer and bass player. I don't want that. I know you don't want that."

"Is that why Alice doesn't remember us?" Thackery asked. He reached for his drink again, and this time he didn't stop until it was gone.

"I'm willing to bet on it," said Dime.

"And how it is you have come to owe him money?" Chessur asked.

"We do a little business for him, with the pirates over in the other park."

Pirates? Weren't Mally and Absolem pirates now? Thackery wondered. "What sort of business?"

"That park's dry, mostly, so we sell them rum. You know how those of us in entertainment who come from… elsewhere… can't go out in town. That's us, and the pirates, and you as well. But pirates gotta have rum. And those boys are locked up even tighter than we are. I mean, you boys are lucky. You can go to the hotels, and to Downtown Disney. I can go over to New Orleans Square sometimes, but that's all… and that's how Faren was able to cut this deal with the pirates."

"Where does Alice come into this?" Chessur asked. "What does she have that he wants?"

"Same thing most men want from a girl, I imagine," Dime said bitterly.

"We have to save her," Thackery mumbled, leaning back on the couch. His head was spinning. He closed his eyes.

Just for a minute…


	19. Chapter 19

"You're going to smoke Chessur's special party time catnip?" Mally asked Absolem, his jaw dropping.

"Yes," the Caterpillar replied as she opened the small packet which Tarrant had just given her.

"Do you not remember what happened that time in October when he put it in the tea, right before we were supposed to go onstage?" Mally squeaked.

"I remember." Absolem did not move to stop what she was doing.

"That was a wondiferous night," Tarrant sighed. He sat down next to Mally, who was still sprawled on Absolem's bed. The Mad Hatter perched on the edge and crossed his legs, twirling his ankle and long, pointed shoe. "Really, I don't know why we don't always have Chessur make the tea."

"Because you love making tea, for one thing," Mally pointed out.

He had to tear his gaze away from Tarrant's foot. It was making him dizzy, underlining how drunk he was. He knew he should get up and go back to his own room before Thackery got back from the park, but Absolem had really soft pillows.

"I do love making tea," said Tarrant.

"And Chessur can't be trusted, for another," Mally added.

"That's true," Absolem said as she finished fiddling with the hookah. She sat down next to Mally, cradling it carefully. "I'm surprised you let him run around with your husband."

"Do you think Thackery could be in danger?" Mally squeaked.

Absolem shrugged. "Maybe. Why don't you go and look for him? And take Tarrant with you."

"Now, now, Absolem – you are just trying to get rid of us," Tarrant said. "Thackery will be fine. Go ahead… enjoy your smoke."

"You may experience side effects from the second hand smoke," Absolem warned, but there was no time for them to actually leave before the room filled with enormous clouds of bright blue smoke.

Mally started coughing immediately and he wished to cheddar that he had indeed left the room when he had the opportunity. Tarrant began to sneeze. In between sneezes, he laughed hysterically, shaking the bed.

"What the feta actually is that stuff?" Mally squeaked, his eyes watering. Tears streamed down his face as if his eyes and nose were fighting together to keep him from consuming any smoke. "It smells like feet…and dead fish…"

"Mmmmmm," Absolem sighed in a dreamy way that made Mally try to stare at her through the smoke and tears. "I think you're mistaken, Mallymkun. But that's okay. You frequently are."

Something had changed in her tone. It seemed gentle, despite the harsh words. She sounded amused, which was rare for the Caterpillar.

"It smells like electricity and devious thoughts," Tarrant said, sneezing again.

"It tastes like strawberries," Absolem murmured, her voice husky.

"Why do you sound like that?" Mally asked. He tried to sit up but couldn't quite manage it. The drinks and the smoke weren't helping, and he was hemmed in with Tarrant and Absolem on either side of him.

"What do I sound like, Mallymkun?" Absolem asked.

"Like…like you're going to purr or something. Is that stuff turning you into a cat?"

Absolem drew in another breath of smoke and puffed it out. Instead of smoke rings, it formed the letters C…A…T…

"Mad brilliant," said Tarrant. "Ah…choo!" The sneeze blew the letters away.

"Mad, anyway," Mally muttered. "Help me get up, Tarrant."

Tarrant looked down at Mally, mischief twinkling in his eyes. He grinned, sneezed, then stretched out on his side next to the Dormouse. He put one hand on Mally's chest and started playing with the collar of his t-shirt.

"Help you get what up?" Tarrant said.

To Mally's surprise, Absolem chuckled. She set the hookah aside, the air around all of them still swirling and blue. Mally's eyes were still watery but at least he had finally stopped coughing. He breathed shallowly, not wanting to inhale the smoke. Tarrant was doing the opposite, drawing in lungful after lungful despite his sneezing, though that seemed to stop when he lay down on the bed next to Mally.

"What are you doing?" Mally asked, narrowing his eyes.

"What are you doing?" Tarrant replied, widening his eyes.

"Tarrant wants to kiss you," said Absolem. She stretched out on the other side of him, smiling in a way that matched the dreamy quality of her voice.

"What are you doing?" Mally asked her. His heart was starting to race in his chest, which wasn't helping his breathing any.

"I also want to kiss you," said Absolem. She licked her pink, succulent lips and Mally felt a jolt of lust coupled with a rush of guilt.

"Uh…I don't think you do." Mally squirmed between them, but Tarrant held him down with just the pressure of one hand.

"That's right, Mallymkun," Tarrant murmured. "Don't think."

Before Mally could protest, Tarrant's mouth came down over his. The Hatter's kiss was forceful and demanding, but also pleasantly minty. Mally jammed his mouth closed, shoving at Tarrant's chest until he stopped.

"You—" he squeaked.

"That seems effective," said Absolem, and before Mally could finish his sentence she bent and kissed him.

Her lips were cool and sweet, but had a lingering fishy flavor that helped remind Mally not to enjoy this. It was clear to him, with his vast experience in kissing, that she had little or none, and he fought the urge to teach her. She lifted up her head and frowned.

"Somehow I thought you would be better at this," she said. "I am willing to give it another go, however. Would you like me to take my shirt off now?"

"I better leave," Mally said, despite the wicked ache in his body.

Oh, Thackery was going to be so upset… and he had already been such a wreck lately. This wasn't going to help anything. Desperately, urgently, Mally needed to see his husband and that gave him the strength to push both Tarrant and Absolem aside and get off of the bed. He wobbled onto his feet and headed towards the door.

"Why are you leaving? I know you are attracted to me, if not to Tarrant," Absolem said, her voice dripping with honey.

"Because it's not fair to Thackery," Mally said. "Not to mention, you're not in your right mind. You don't really want this, and you'll be angry at me later."

"She really ought only be angry at Chessur," Tarrant pointed out. "Now, Absolem, do you know who is extremely good at kissing? Why, I am! Let me show you!"

"Don't let him show you," Mally said.

"Mally, come back," said Absolem. She reached for the edge of her sweatshirt, and Mally grabbed for the door handle before she could pull it off.

The Dormouse stumbled into the hallway. He gasped for breath as he careened down the hall, trying to put as much distance between Absolem and himself as he could. He hated abandoning her with Tarrant when clearly she was out of her head but he knew he couldn't stay another moment. He needed to find Thackery.

Mally tripped over his own feet. Before he could hit the ground, a pair of arms caught him and he sighed in relief until he saw to whom they belonged.

"Hello, mousie," said Chessur, grinning with a mouthful of sharp teeth.


	20. Chapter 20

Thackery awoke to the smell of coffee and freshly baked cinnamon rolls. The delicious scents teased him back into awareness, though it took him a few minutes to realize that he was not in his bed in the hotel, but on the couch in Dime's little backstage apartment. He was still in his outfit from the night before, his head ached, and his mouth tasted atrocious, but he had been covered with a soft, warm blanket.

Dressed in a pale green housecoat and matching marabou trimmed slippers, Dime set a mug of coffee and plate of cinnamon rolls on the glass coffee table, then sat down on the loveseat across from him. Thackery sat up and ran a hand through his untidy hair, combing the fur of his ears with his fingers. He looked at her sheepishly.

"Thank you… and… I'm sorry I fell asleep on your couch."

"You're welcome," Dime said kindly. "Are you okay, Slam? You were a mess last night."

"I… I don't know. I've just had so much on my mind lately."

"Drinking doesn't solve your problems," she said sternly.

Thackery felt his cheeks burn. "It seems to help."

"Not when you overdo it like that. Why wasn't Baby looking out for you? A real friend knows when to tell you to stop."

She shook her head and took a sip of her coffee, reminding him that he hadn't touched his. Thackery reached for the cup. It felt warm in his hands and smelled good. He preferred tea by a long shot but this wasn't terrible – not like when Mally attempted to make it in their room. Dime had fixed it with cream and sugar. He took a taste and felt it warm him all the way down.

"He's not much of a friend," Thackery said.

"What makes you say that?" Dime asked curiously.

"He's always after my husband."

"Oh. OH." Dime looked surprised, then she smiled. "I guess I didn't realize which way either of you swung. Baby doesn't really seem the type, but if you say so."

Thackery wasn't sure what she was talking about, so he picked up a cinnamon roll and stuffed it into his mouth. Once Alice had told him that sometimes people from here were funny about males being with other males, but he had never encountered such a thing in the parks. He swallowed the bite of the pastry and tried to think of an appropriate response.

"All of us like swing music," he ventured.

Dime chuckled warmly. Tea, he'd gotten it wrong. "Not what I meant by swing. Maybe I was hoping I'd turn your head, or Baby's."

He blushed again. Okay, now he understood. "That's very flattering, but I'm very devoted to Mally. I hope I haven't worried him, staying out all night. I should probably get back to the hotel!"

"Sorry, honey, but there isn't time for that. We have a show in an hour. You need to finish that breakfast, take a shower, and get ready to play. It's your first day on the job!"

She ushered him into a small bathroom, provided towels, and hung a bag with his blue plaid outfit on the back of the door. By the time he stepped out, Chessur had joined Dime in the living room and had Thackery's magic fedora in his hands.

"I left that on my bed," Thackery said.

"Yes, that's where I found it," Chessur said, smiling slowly.

"Did you… did you see Mally?" Thackery's hands balled up into fists.

"Most certainly." Now the cat showed all his sharp teeth as he smiled, the smile seeming to float off of his face in the creepy manner he often possessed.

"Tell me you left him alone," Thackery whispered.

"Boys, it's time to go," Dime said sharply. She had changed into her orange dress and she helped tuck Thackery's ears into his hat before she began shepherding them down the stairs, out the door, and down the street towards where the jalopy was parked backstage.

"Don't worry about your Dormouse," Chessur said. "It will take your mind off of your playing, and this is a big day for us. We have got to do better than Tarrant."

"He was pretty bad," Thackery admitted, "Though I liked his outfit."

"He's already been fired from the Dapper Dans," Chessur said as they picked up their instruments. "They've got him working in a hat shop on Main Street."

"Well… he ought to like that," said Thackery.

T-bone, Zoot, and Clyde were already in the car and they all exchanged handshakes and good-mornings. Thackery wondered what they would think if they knew he had spent the night in Dime's apartment, or if they already knew. He decided not to bring it up, and hoped that Chessur wouldn't either.

Thackery lifted the upright bass into the jalopy. The instrument felt so good in his hands, and he strummed it as they settled in. The gate opened to release the car into the park and they began to play. Dime's voice shimmered magically in the morning air. The bass came to life, and Thackery felt peace in his heart at last. Nothing mattered but the music.

Pure happiness thrummed inside the March Hare as the Five and Dime jalopy cruised slowly down the street. For the first set, they would just ride through the park without getting out. That was fine with him. The second time, they would park the car and get out to perform a few numbers. They were expected to do six performances in all and would finish up in the early afternoon. Dime said that in the summer they would do more shows, as many as ten in a day, but Thackery didn't mind. He and Chessur had a good grip on all the new songs they had learned.

Between sets, they mostly jammed in the break room. Thack didn't mind. It saved him from making conversation. He watched Chessur's greasy charm shine through as he used it on the rest of the band. He could be likeable when he wanted to. There had been times when Thackery had almost been fond of him. However, when he thought of all the times Chess had hurt Mally, it made him tremble with anxiety.

He couldn't think about Mally now, or he would never make it through his day. Thackery thought longingly of the bottle of bourbon in Dime's apartment, but he also knew that drinking while they were working was forbidden. Before they had been sent back to Wonderland, rules hadn't seemed quite so terrifying. Now, the threat of a second return loomed heavily.

Lunch time arrived, and the band discussed where they wanted to go for food.

"I ain't had time to cook today," said Dime. "So we can go to the backstage café if you want."

"They got nothin' on you, darlin'," T-bone sighed.

"Not to mention it ain't cheap," Zoot added.

"And we don't get paid again til Thursday," added Zoot. He looked at T-bone plaintively. "Didn't we get any cut from Faren?"

T-bone shook his head. "Afraid not. Maybe if Dime was a little nicer to him."

"Just what exactly are you suggesting?" Dime demanded.

Before the guitarist could reply, the door to their break room opened. Thackery gasped as he saw a familiar figure appear with a large picnic hamper.

"No need to go out to lunch, boys," said Alice. "I've brought you over a nice meal. Who's hungry?"


	21. Chapter 21

"Let go of me at once, Chessur!" said Mallymkun the Dormouse quite sternly.

Well, that was what Mally wanted to say but instead he let out a terrified squeak and couldn't quite make any words. Before he could start to struggle, Chessur's hand stroked down his back, squeezed his rear end, and extracted his room key from the back pocket of his jeans.

"Here we go," said Chessur. With a swift motion he dragged Mally to the door, unlocked it, and propelled them both into the room. The cat dropped Mally on the bed and stood there, staring down at him.

"You can leave now," Mallymkun managed. "Thackery!"

"Your bunny won't be home tonight," Chessur said, smirking. He folded his arms over his chest and licked his lips. "We are quite alone."

"What did you do to him?" Mally demanded, wishing he would stop squeaking. His head was spinning and he began to feel nauseous.

"What did I do to him? I looked after him, when you didn't, and Tarrant didn't. How was it wise to let him careen drunkenly through the park looking for Alice?" Chessur asked in a low, even voice that inspired as much guilt as kissing Absolem had.

"I was going to go after him, but you had already gone," Mally insisted.

"And that stopped you?" Chessur sighed.

"Yes! I was afraid—I thought you might… uh…"

"I still might," Chessur said, smirking at him. "You do look quite an inviting mess right now, you know?"

Mally instinctively scooted backwards on the bed, bumping his head against the headboard behind him. "I'm not inviting anything. Where's Thack?"

"He's safe," said Chessur. "I left him in good hands, which I suppose is more than I can say for you. What did Tarrant do to you? And why didn't Absolem stop him?"

"What makes you think Tarrant did anything?" Mally asked, his face turning red.

"Your lovely cheeks are admitting to it. Besides, did you not see how he was looking at you while he was plying Thackery with drinks?" Chessur asked, tilting his head.

He hadn't come any closer to the bed, but Mally's heart was still racing. Tarrant had been plying him with drinks as well, Mally thought. Was that why? Was Tarrant trying to get in his pants the same Chessur had been? Well, maybe not the same way – Mally was never entirely sure whether Chess wanted to rape him or kill him and eat him, and one wasn't much better than the other. And then there was Absolem, but Mally couldn't blame her for anything… she had been under the influence of the party time catnip. Hadn't she?

"I am just too feta good-looking for my own health," Mally muttered, shaking his head.

Chessur laughed and floated closer in a ridiculously creepy way, his smile shining bigger and brighter than the rest of his face. It was almost worse now that he was so thin. The cat drifted onto the edge of the bed, sitting down next to Mally. It was the second time that evening he had regretted being in a bed, which was an unusual occurrence for him.

"You are a vain little monster," the cat said. "I don't know what Thackery sees in you."

"Your catnip turned Absolem into a sex maniac," Mally said. "She was all over me, too."

"Did it? Oh, I wish I had been there to see that," Chessur sighed. "Is that why you're so rumpled? Have you been buggering the bug?"

"I had to escape from her AND Tarrant," Mally grumbled. "And now you're here, and the one person I actually do want to have sex with is missing."

"He is not missing. He is fine. He will probably have a headache in the morning, as will you." Before Mally could sense that he was going to do it, Chessur flipped over and lay on top of him, pinning him to the bed. "I would advise both of you to stop listening to Tarrant's advice regarding human alcohol… except, Mallymkun, I do like you so delightfully incapacitated."

Chessur ground his hips against the Dormouse. Mally felt an unwanted answer in his groin. The cat grabbed the collar of Mally's t-shirt and ripped it open, baring his throat. He bent his head, licking over Mally's throbbing pulse. Mally's breath hitched. He was paralyzed with fear. Chessur seemed as strong as he always had. His sharp teeth grazed Mally's throat and he couldn't even manage the embarrassing squeak.

"Delicious," Chessur hissed, his breath hot against Mally's skin.

"No," Mally moaned. "Please…"

"I like to hear you beg."

"Please… please don't!" 

"Why fight it, Mallymkun? You can't win."

Can't win… can't win… the words echoed in Mally's hear, but despite the situation he was in, he refused to believe them. He summoned all of his strength and his courage, and gave Chessur a shove.

It did little good. The cat chuckled and began nibbling at Mally's neck again, the teeth feeling sharper as he did. He wrapped his arms around Mally, his claws prickling the Dormouse's sides, digging in enough to cause pain.

"I can win! I feta cheddar can win!"

With all his strength, Mally pushed and rolled at the same time. To both their surprise he flipped them over and found himself lying on top of Chessur. Mally sat up, accidentally straddling the drummer. Chessur's hands rested on Mally's thighs. His face was stamped with astonishment which quickly melted into his usual smug grin.

"I can't say I mind being underneath you," Chessur said lazily. "Though I'm not usually one to give up the dominant position. Tell me, is this how you make love to Thackery? I'd always assumed he was the top."

"That's none of your business!"

"Surely in March, he—"

"That's REALLY none of your business!"

Mally scrambled off of Chessur, and in attempting to get off of the bed, fell face down on the floor. Quickly he jumped back to his feet, the adrenaline rush chasing away most of the drunken feeling and whatever side effects he had suffered from the blue smoke. He marched towards the door of the hotel room and had yanked it indignantly open before he remembered that he was the one who lived here.

Mally turned around and glared at the cat. "Get out, Chessur!"

"Are you sure? If you invite me to stay, I will buy you breakfast in the morning," the cat wheedled.

"Get! Out! Now!" Mally pointed out into the hallway.

Chessur sighed heavily. "Very well."

Taking his time, the cat extracted himself from the bed. He straightened up the rumpled blankets and picked up Thackery's fedora, which had been crushed beneath them. Carefully the cat twisted it back into shape as he languidly strolled towards the door.

"Thackery will need this," he said.

"I can give it to him tomorrow." Mally reached for the fedora but Chess snatched it away.

"Ah, but you don't know where he is. Good night, mousie."

With that, Chessur faded out of sight, the hat seeming to float in the air before it bobbed off down the hallway, presumably in the cat's paws. Mally closed the door and leaned against it, sighing with relief. Exhaustion overwhelmed him and he stumbled back to the bed.

He didn't think he would be able to sleep without Thackery, but he was wrong.


	22. Chapter 22

Thackery's eyes opened wide as Alice came into the Five and Dime break room. He glanced over at Chessur and saw that the cat had been startled as well, though he quickly regained his composure. He shot Thack a warning look, but what he was warning him against, the March Hare had no idea.

"Why, how nice of you to come by with lunch, Celia," Dime said, smiling kindly at the blonde. "Let me get some plates."

"Thank you, Dime. I hope you like it. It's really not that fancy but there's plenty."

"Nice, indeed!" said T-bone. "Zoot, Clyde – get those horns off the table so C.C. can put down that basket.

"On it, boss," said Zoot.

"You're a doll, C.C.," said Clyde.

"It's my pleasure," Alice said, looking down at her fingers. "Sorry if it got a little cold."

"Thank you," Thackery said automatically when she caught his eye. Her cheeks turned a bit pink and she nodded, tossing her hair over her shoulders.

"Not this again," Chessur grumbled.

"What are you talking about?" Thackery asked.

"You'll figure it out."

"I like your hat," Alice said as she made a beeline towards him. "How did you get your ears up in there?"

"Uh… Dime… helped me," Thackery said, swallowing hard. His heart was racing. They weren't supposed to talk to Alice.

"So you like hats, do you?" Chessur said. "What about Hatters?"

Alice reached out and pulled the hat off of Thackery's head. His long hair and floppy teal bunny ears fell down to frame his face and she sighed. Alice reached out and petted one of his ears. Her fingers were icy cold. Thackery flipped his ears back over his shoulders.

"Please don't…"

"I'm sorry!"

"No…no…it's okay… it's just…"

"They're sensitive, and I'm not supposed to because… because…" Alice frowned, then shook her head. Her face turned from pink to bright red and she sheepishly handed him the fedora back.

"So where is your friend Faren?" Chessur asked, interrupting loudly. "Look, Thackery, you have snow on your ears."

"Sorry," Alice whispered, but then she smiled, looking into Thackery's eyes. "It just happens sometimes."

"I understand."

Dime dropped the plate she was holding and it fell to the floor. Luckily, it was made of paper. She left the other guys to the food and hurried over to the three of them. She smiled at Alice and slipped the fedora out of Thackery's fingers, then tucked his hair and ears back up inside it as the blonde girl watched curiously.

"Thank you for the sandwiches," she said. "The pie looks real nice, too. And did I see a cake in there?"

"It's carrot cake," said Alice. Chessur groaned.

"It is?" said Thackery.

"Something told me you would like it."

"I do like it…it's…it's my favorite." She knew it was his favorite, and she must have remembered…somehow…deep down. There was hope! But what to do? And how?

"Well, good," said Alice.

"Why don't you cut him a slice, honey?" Dime suggested, ushering Alice towards the table. While she was busy doing that, Dime slipped back over to Thackery and Chessur.

"Does she do this often?" Chessur asked, waving a hand at the picnic basket.

"No! Never!" Dime whispered. "Clearly she came here to see you two, and clearly she didn't tell Faren. We'll all be in hot water if he finds out."

"Better than being frozen," said Thackery, lifting his chin. "She is my best friend, and she needs our help!"

"How are we going to help her, Thackery?" Chessur demanded. "She doesn't remember us, or who she is. And if she did, who knows what bargain she made with Faren to get us here? What if breaking the spell sends us all back to Wonderland? Is that what you want?"

"No…" Thackery sighed. "But half of my problems in Wonderland were your fault! You kept going after Mally!"

"This isn't the time to bicker," Dime said. "Baby, sometimes you got to learn when a man just isn't interested in you. And Slam, you need to trust your husband to say no."

"There's a little more to it," Thackery muttered.

"And we really needn't discuss it here," Chessur added smoothly. "Suffice to say, everyone prefers it here."

"Fine. So maybe you ought to leave that girl alone."

"What girl?" asked Alice, handing Thackery the plate of carrot cake. It smelled delicious and his stomach growled, even though it was tied in a knot. "Do you have a girlfriend, Thackery?"

"He does," said Chessur. "Her name is Mallymkun."

"That's a pretty name," said Alice, sounding a little disappointed. "Have I heard it before?"

"Mally is not my girlfriend!" Thackery snapped at Chessur.

"Pardon me. Your wife." Chessur nodded at Thackery's ring, which in turn reminded him sharply that Mally had lost his ring.

"Chessur—"

"Oh look, it's almost time for us to do our next show," said Dime.

"We have half an hour!" said Zoot, through a mouthful of coleslaw.

"I'm sorry, C.C., honey, but we need a little time to practice." Dime steered Alice towards the door. "I'll get your basket back to Faren—er, to you, later."

"But, Dime, I wanted to tell you… there's an audition for an all-girl band to play over at Disneyland tomorrow, and I was hoping you would come with me," Alice said as Dime shoved her out. "Five in the afternoon in the rehearsal hall. Will I see you there?"

"I'll see if I'm free. Thanks for letting me know." She practically shoved Alice out, then shut the door behind her.

"You're not free," said T-bone. "We need you to play with us." 

"Yeah," said Clyde. "What gives?"

"Don't worry, fellas," said Dime. "I'm not going anywhere. I like this band. But I don't need to tell you that we have to tread careful where Faren is concerned. C.C. is his girl, and we work for him."

"That reminds me," said T-bone. "Baby, Slam—I have a job for you."


	23. Chapter 23

The nibbling on his earlobe teased Mally into awareness, though he wasn't exactly awake. Thack must have come home in the night. Yes, good. Joy flowed through him as he snuggled closer to the warm body in his bed. Softness pressed against him and warmed him and he drew in a deep breath, expecting the sweet, familiar scent of blackberry jam that Thackery emitted. Instead, he detected a lingering odor of fish warming in the sun.

"Thackery?" Mally mumbled into his pillow.

Teeth bit down sharply on his earlobe and cool breath hissed in his ear, followed by an unfamiliar giggle.

"Not at all," said a playful, feminine voice.

"Ouch! Feta! Absolem?"

It couldn't be. It could not be remotely possible.

"Yes, dear."

No wonder the giggle was unfamiliar. Mally had never heard Absolem giggle in the entire time that they had known each other. Not once. She licked his ear where she had just chomped down on it so harshly, and the sensation went straight to Mally's groin. He groaned and tried to scoot away from her, but she had her arms and legs wrapped around him. At least his back was to her...

"What are you doing in my bed?"

"Good things."

Her hands wandered around to his front and he grabbed them to stop her from trespassing.

"Do you remember the part where I'm married to Thackery?" Mally squeaked. He cleared his throat, trying to sound less panicked. "Or the part where you were the one who married us?"

"I remember everything," Absolem sighed into his ear. "Except wanting you this way. Is this why Chessur is so completely crazy?"

"I think that's because he's from Wonderland and madness is kind of our thing," Mally said, still trying to crawl out of her arms. "Also, I think you should think twice about smoking his Party Time Catnip."

"I frankly don't know if I would rather thank him or punch him," Absolem murmured. "But I do know what I want to do to you…"

"Great," said Mally. "I hope that want you want to do is to let go of me so I can go back to sleep in peace."

"You can't go back to sleep. We have to go to work," Absolem said sensibly. She began running her fingers through his hair. "That's why I came in here. To get you up."

"You're very provolone near succeeding," Mally muttered. "How did you get in?"

"I took your key from Chessur."

"Chessur had my key. Great."

"I am not completely sure why he needed it. After all, he can go anywhere he likes, any time he likes. An enviable talent, really."

"Terrifying, you mean."

"Are you ticklish, Mallymkun?"

"All right, time to get out of bed!" Mally squeaked, using all of his strength to break out of her arms. He rolled over so quickly that he fell out of the bed onto the floor. He was relieved to discover that he was still wearing his underwear, and that he had no sort of a hangover.

Mally wobbled to his feet and turned to look sternly at Absolem. She seemed to be wearing the same outfit she had had on the night before, including her glasses. Her long brown hair wasn't even a mess. She smiled at him and pursed her lips, then winked saucily. Mally sighed and shook his head.

"When is that stuff going to wear off?"

"The Party Time Catnip? It wore off hours ago."

"I don't think it did," Mally said, arching his eyebrows. "I'm going to take a shower."

"Sounds like fun!" Absolem sat up on the edge of the bed.

"You're going to stay here!"

Mally opened the wardrobe and began pulling out some clothes before he realized hat they were his old, too small things. Feta. He needed some of Thack's clothes. Staring at them, his stomach twisted. Where the feta WAS Thackery? Was he okay? He wished that they could just go look for him instead, but he knew better than to suggest that they skip out on pirate duty.

"Do you think you could maybe make some tea?" he asked Absolem softly. Her expression melted from lustful to sympathetic for a moment, but then Mally's stomach growled loudly and she giggled again.

"I'll order you some breakfast," she said, reaching for the telephone, "But you owe me."

"Great."

Grabbing Thackery's favorite teal button-down shirt and black jeans, Mally headed into the bathroom. He could hear Absolem on the phone through the door.

"Hello, room service? I would like to order a meal for my boyfriend. He will require lots of cheese."

An hour later, the two of them were walking through Disneyland park, headed for the pirate band break room. Mally had given up trying to stop Absolem from holding his hand. His stomach was full and he felt refreshed and awake from the shower, so aside from worrying about Thackery, all seemed right with the world. It was a beautiful morning, and Mally rarely got to enjoy mornings. He looked around with wonder at the sight of the sunlight playing off of the whimsical buildings of Main Street.

"Hey, there's a shop named after Tarrant over there," Mally said. "The Mad Hatter."

"That's where he is working today," Absolem replied. "They sell the mouse ear hats. Like the ones that couple is wearing."

"Yeah, those hats are stupid. They look nothing like my ears."

Mally squinted at the couple. They had had their hats personalized, but both of them said Alice on the back. Were both the man and woman named Alice? How very curious…

"They are not meant to look like your ears. They are regular mouse ears, not Dormouse ears."

"They don't look like regular mouse ears, either!"

"Your ears are very tasty, by the way."

"Thank you. Don't ever try to taste them again."

As they continued down the street, Mally noticed several other people wearing different versions of the ear hats, with different decorations on them. They were certainly popular, though he had never noticed how much so before this morning. It seemed like every other person had one on his or her head.

All of them, without exception, had the name Alice embroidered on the back.

"Well," said Mally, "I guess Tarrant made it to his new job on time."


	24. Chapter 24

"Just relax, Thackery," Chessur hissed at the March Hare as they headed out of California Adventure into Disneyland. "It's only two bottles and you don't have to take them though the bag check."

"We could get in a lot of trouble if we get caught," Thackery whispered loudly.

"We could get in even more trouble if we don't do this," Chessur insisted.

"Why are you making me carry the bottles?"

"Because you're dumb enough to agree to it, silly rabbit. You really are a mess, you know that, Thackery? It's become really easy to take advantage of you. It's not even fun any more," Chessur sighed.

Thackery stopped walking. After everything that Chessur had put him and Mally through, why should the cat's words still surprise him? Worse that that—why should they sting?

"I'm tired of all of this," he said. "I'm tired of how you treat me, and Mally. I'm tired of your games, and your deceit, and your lies. I'm tired of how Tarrant acts when he's with you. I know you influence him, and I know he lets you. I don't doubt that somehow all of this, even what's happened to Alice, is ALL YOUR FAULT."

Thackery's hands knotted in to fists and he nearly dropped the bag he was carrying. He was so furious that he couldn't see straight, and he hated that more than anything, he wanted to pull out the bottle and take a long pull from it.

Chessur looked surprised for a brief moment, then grinned, the smile growing bigger and bigger until it floated in front of his face. He nodded, then put out his hand towards Thackery.

"So there is some fire left in you. Very well. I will take the bag, I will see that it gets delivered, and I will help you extract Alice from the situation into which she has gotten herself, and us."

Thackery blinked. Was Chessur playing a trick on him? Was he sincere? Had he ever been sincere? Was he even capable of sincerity? Not wanting to lose the opportunity to rid himself of the burden, he handed Chess the bag of rum. The cat took it, nodded, then vanished into thin air.

Thackery looked around in a panic, hoping no one had seen the trick. No one was paying him the slightest amount of attention. He thought about turning around and running straight back to the hotel, but instead, he squared his shoulders and walked across the way to Disneyland.

The March Hare didn't know the way to the pirates break room. He had only been backstage in this part of the park a few times, and he didn't want to wander around by himself. But how to find Mally? Thack knew there was a pirate ride, so he headed blindly in that direction, searching for a clue.

He reached up and tugged on one of his long, soft teal bunny ears. He had changed back into his personal clothes after they had finished playing with Five and Dime for the day. Rather, Mally's clothes, since his own were now too big. He missed his black jeans, though Mally's blue jeans were comfortable. Part of him wished he still had the fedora on, but his long ears hardly drew a glance. People were used to guests wearing silly things on their heads. It was expected. Lots of people were running around with the signature mouse ears on.

Thackery blinked, as he noticed just how many people around him were wearing them. He knew that you could get your name sewed onto the back… but why did every one he saw seem to say Alice on it? It was strange, and it gave him the chills.

Thackery shook his head as he detected the low note of a bass guitar on the wind. He headed past the pirate ride up a small hill towards a restaurant… two… three restaurants? No matter. The pirate band was playing in front of one of them, and Mally and Absolem were part of the group. Thackery's heart skipped a beat and he felt a wild sense of both joy and relief. Mally was okay!

To be honest, Mally looked pretty damn happy. He was wearing a ragged pirate costume and a pink striped hat and playing a mandolin. Absolem had a big pirate hat on with her outfit, and was mastering a jaunty tune on the accordion. There was something odd about her, and it took Thackery a moment to figure out what it was.

She looked happy.

Thackery thought that he really hadn't ever seen Absolem look happy before. She wore it well, and the knowledge of this unlocked something deep inside of him. The two of them clearly felt very at home playing with the Bootstrappers. The other four members of the band interacted so naturally with them that they seemed to have just as much chemistry as the Mad T Party band.

Thackery felt a twinge of jealousy, but it passed quickly. He might wish he was playing with Mally, but he couldn't begrudge him the joy he had clearly found in his new gig. He hung back, afraid to get too close to the pirates. Afraid to tread on that happiness.

Should have known he couldn't hide.

Mally spotted him, and Thackery easily read the rush of emotions that slammed through the Dormouse. Relief, love, joy… a hint of anger. Mally was probably right to be angry at him. After all, Thackery didn't think Chessur had gone out of his way to let Mally know where Thackery had been all night. Knowing the cat, he'd given Mally a lie that made it worse.

There was no sign of the cat anywhere at the moment. Thackery was mostly glad, but he still hoped that Chessur had kept his word about delivering the rum. He didn't want to have another run-in with Faren.

The rollicking tune that the Bootstrappers were playing ended, and the leader of the group announced that the pirates were headed back to their hideout to enjoy some rum. Mally bowed to Thackery as they passed.

"We're done for the day. Meet me near the Jungle Cruise in ten minutes."

It was a very long ten minutes.

Mally and Absolem wound through the crowd towards him. Absolem was clinging to Mally's elbow, giggling at whatever he was saying. She was wearing a very short pair of shorts and a tight t-shirt that showed off all of her recently acquired feminine assets. For a moment Thackery wondered if it even WAS Absolem, for this girl had no caterpillar-like qualities whatsoever. Mally looked wrenchingly handsome in one of Thack's favorite button-down shirts and the inky black jeans that he missed so much.

"What's going on here?" he asked.

"Absolem smoked some of Chessur's Party Time Catnip and it made her into a sex maniac," Mally said, trying to pull away from her.

"I can't be a sex maniac if you won't have sex with me," Absolem replied logically.

"There's something I never thought I'd hear, and be relieved to hear it," Thackery said, staring at her. "How long does it take that stuff to wear off?"

"Long enough for us to have a threesome," Absolem said, winking at Thackery.

"What?"

"Two months, I think," Mally said. "You remember that Halloween when—"

"Yes, I remember, but I don't want to." Thackery cut him off. "Have you seen Chessur? He was supposed to be delivering something."

"He stopped by and talked to Mathison."

"Who?"

"Our captain."

"Your what?"

"The pirate band leader," said Absolem. "And if I recall, he told you not to take that hat, Mally. I know you stuffed it in your pocket when we left."

"I'll bring it back tomorrow," Mally said, refusing to look her in the eye.

"That pink hat?" Thackery asked. "The one you were wearing?"

"Yeah. Anyway. Thack—I owe you an apology. I should have gone with you to look for Alice last night, but I was…afraid…"

Mally's cheeks turned as pink as the hat, and Thackery knew he was embarrassed, a rare emotion for one who simply made bold choices in everything that he did. He nodded. He wanted to kiss his husband very badly, but he also felt that a crowded theme park wasn't the opportune place to do that.

"We have to face our fears," Thackery said, taking a deep breath. "It's the only way that we can rescue Alice."


	25. Chapter 25

"There's Tarrant!" said Mally as he, Absolem, and Thackery approached the exit gate of Disneyland park.

The Mad Hatter was sitting dejectedly on a bench near the floral arrangement, surrounded by a giant stack of ear hats that he was handing out to random passers-by. Every single one of them had Alice's name embroidered on the back. Tarrant was dressed in the plaid costume that the people who worked in the stores on Main Street all wore, but on his head was a stack of the hats he was giving away.

"I'm going to guess that his job in the hat shop didn't work out very well," Thackery said, shaking his head.

"Have you gotten yourself fired again?" Absolem asked the Hatter bluntly as they approached.

Tarrant's pathetic expression changed instantly as his friends approached. A manic smile replaced his quivering pout, and he leapt to his feet. Mally was amazed that the pile of hats managed to stay on his head.

"My friends!" Tarrant crowed. "Yes, it is true that I am no longer employed at The Mad Hatter, which is utter nonsense since I am, in fact, known as the Mad Hatter."

"That's true," said Mally.

"It is!" said Tarrant. "They seemed to think that I was using the embroidery machine incorrectly—" He interrupted himself to hand ear hats to a passing family. "There you go! Wear them proudly! Now, as I was saying, it is quite clear that I have spelled every single one of these hats absolutely correctly! Look at this one!" Tarrant held up an ear hat and tossed it onto the ground. "And this one! And this one! This one is particularly nice… I used the pink thread….and—"

"Okay, Tarrant, okay," said Thackery, grabbing the Hatter's hands. "You did a wonderful job. And they were obviously foolish to say otherwise."

Tarrant nodded. "Yes. Obviously foolish."

Absolem nodded as well, her eyes glinting behind her glasses. "Yes. Obviously foolish." Somehow Mally didn't think she meant it the same way as the others.

Mally's stomach growled. "Can we go get something to eat?" The three of them stared at him for a moment. "What? I'm hungry."

Thackery's lips turned upwards. "Yes, of course we can, Mally. Let's…let's all just go back to the hotel."

By the time they reached the Hearthstone Lounge, Tarrant was down to wearing just one ear hat, and they had left a long trail behind them. Absolem had pinched Mally's ass about fourteen times and Thackery had said next to nothing. Mally was having a fantasy about the lounge's cheese plate that was provolone near erotic, but it disappeared into a puff of irritation when he saw Chessur ensconced comfortably in a booth in the bar next to a very lovely woman in an orange dress.

"Delightful, you've all arrived together," Chessur said, smiling wickedly. "I was afraid I would have to make an effort in rounding you up. This is so much easier. Join me. Mallymkun, I have already ordered the cheese plate."

"I don't want it," Mally said and the cat laughed.

"Liar. I shall enjoy watching you fight yourself before you inevitably succumb to your desires," Chessur said. "Sit down."

Tarrant and Absolem took two of the seats while Mally stood there with Thackery staring at him. Clearly Thack meant to back him up in whatever he decided and that was immensely satisfying, but the cat was right. Mally wanted the feta cheese plate. He plunked himself down and nodded at Thackery, then looked at the woman.

"Who's this?"

"This is Dime," Thackery said excitedly. "She is part of the new act that Chessur and I are in – she's a wonderful singer."

"Well, thank you, Slam," said Dime, smiling modestly.

"This is my husband, Mally."

"I can see why you're so in love with him," Dime replied, and Mally enjoyed the stroke to his ego. He grinned and winked at her.

"This is Absolem, our keyboard player, and Tarrant—"

"Enchanteé, Mademoiselle," said Tarrant, taking Dime's hand and shaking it vigorously. "And now, a round of drinks!"

"No!" said Mally, Thackery, and Absolem all at once.

"I hate when the two of you actually learn something," Chessur remarked.

"Don't you mean the three of us?" Thackery looked at Absolem.

"No," said Absolem. "I already knew that drinking is a bad idea. At least the way the two of you were doing it last night."

"You didn't try to stop us," Mally pointed out.

"It's not my place to stop you from doing foolish things, Mallymkun."

"At least you sound more like your old self," said Thackery.

"Are you sure you wouldn't like a Drink Me?" Tarrant asked Mally.

"Pretty sure," said Mally. The cheese plate arrived just then and he studiously ignored Chessur's gaze as he stuffed a chunk of brie into his mouth.

"Alas," said Tarrant.

"Did you say 'alas' or 'Alice'?" Thackery asked.

"Who is Alice?" Tarrant asked, tilting his head.

"You are here for a reason," Absolem said to Dime, clearly not wanting Tarrant and Thackery to go on. "Will you share it with us?"

Dime nodded. "I think we all want the same thing," she said very softly. "To get out from under Faren's thumb. Baby and I think we know how to do it."

"Who is Baby?" ask Mally, blinking.

"Chessur," said Thackery, putting his hand on Mally's thigh under the table.

"Really?" Mally started laughing and probably wouldn't have stopped if the cat hadn't picked up a hunk of cheddar and stuffed it into the Dormouse's mouth. He chewed and tried not to choke, shaking his head.

"Just listen," said Dime. "Tomorrow there's an audition for a new band, and Celia asked me to go with her. All you lot have to do is show up there, and Tarrant, you give her True Love's Kiss, and she'll get rid of Faren."

"I see a lot of holes in this plan," said Absolem.

"I think it's perfect!" said Tarrant.

"That's one of the holes," said Absolem.

"Trust me, it will work," said Chessur.

"And there's another," said Absolem.

"We don't really have many other options," said Thackery.

"I'm in," said Mally, shrugging.

"Great," said Chessur. "Come pick up your disguises from me tomorrow morning."

"Disguises?" Mally frowned. "What sort of—"

"Disguises!" Tarrant crowed with excitement. "What great plan ever succeeded without them?"

"What makes you think this is a great plan?" Absolem asked.

"I trust Dime," said Thackery very seriously.

"Okay," said Mally, taking the March Hare's hand and squeezing it. "Then that is enough for me."


	26. Chapter 26

Thackery bit his lower lip until he tasted blood. He and Mally had left the others in the lounge, walking hand in hand back to their room. He was glad that they had some sort of a plan to help Alice, even if it wasn't much of one and hinged on her getting rid of Faren. How that would happen, he had no idea.

"Are you okay?" Mally asked as they boarded the elevator. "You're breaking my fingers."

"I'm sorry!" Thackery yanked his hand away and bounced backwards a step. "I'm just so… so… anxious… and worried… and Mally! Today is the first day in a long time that I have faced my fears without a Drink Me."

Mally looked at him with wide, beautiful blue eyes, and Thackery's breath caught in his throat. The Dormouse reached out and took Thack's hand again. "Squeeze as hard as you need to."

Thackery rushed into his arms. He couldn't wait any longer. He brought his mouth to Mally's kissing him fiercely, saying with his lips and his heart all the things he couldn't manage to string together in a sentence. Mally kissed him back with equal fervor, murmuring into his mouth.

"For the love of gouda, Thackery Earwicket. I love you. I love you so much."

"I'm sorry I didn't come home last night."

"You can make up for it now."

Thackery's heart raced as the elevator opened and Mally tugged him down the hall, hurrying to their room.

"Do you have your key?" Mally asked.

"Yeah…" Thackery pulled it out of this jeans pocket.

"Good. I think Absolem still has mine."

"Why did Absolem—"

Mally interrupted by kissing Thackery again, somehow managing to get the door to the room open while he did. The Dormouse steered the March Hare towards the bed, pulling Thackery's t-shirt over his head as he did. It was still odd that he was able to do so, but being taller than Thackery now certainly helped.

Thackery unbuttoned Mally's shirt with trembling fingers and slid it off of his shoulders. Mally's pale flesh was so beautiful. He pressed a kiss to the perfect collarbone, felt the Dormouse suck in a deep breath. At first Thack worried he might have scared him. He'd forgotten that Mally got nervous about being bitten… but a glance up to his eyes said it was quite the opposite. Mally brought his mouth to Thackery's and kissed him again.

Together they fell into the bed, squirming as Thackery tried to get both of their pants off at the same time. Mally's hands went for Thackery's ears and he fell still as the Dormouse began to stroke and fondle them with absolute precision. Mally was naked except for his socks, but Thack's pants were wrapped around his knees and ankles, his shorts doing nothing to hide his raging desire.

Mally's calloused fingers danced the length of Thackery's teal green fur, then he bent his head and brought the tip of his tongue to that flesh. Thackery let out a low, keening sounds.

"F-feels…so good…Mally!" he gasped.

The Dormouse chuckled, and nibbled just slightly at the March Hare's ear. Thackery bucked against him, worried he would soil his underwear before they reached the pivotal part of this act. The pleasure was so intense, and Mally didn't rush. It went on and on until Thackery was hovering inside of one of the most erotic moments of his life.

"My bunny," Mally said, his voice throaty.

"I'm…I'm going to—!"

"Not yet you aren't!" Mally lifted his head and slid back.

"Don't stop!"

"Believing? Do you want to hold on to that feeling?"

"Mally!"

Mally chuckled. "I love you, Thackery. I really do."

"Then why did you stop?"

"So I can do this…"

Mally untangled Thackery's feet from his pants and tossed them to the floor. He toyed with the waistband of Thack's shorts, then bent his head and kissed what was straining to escape through the cloth. Thackery gasped. His hips bucked, so Mally grasped them, then yanked off the underwear to join the rest of their clothes on the floor. Thackery had one sock off and one on but he didn't care remotely about that right now. He was rock hard and aching.

Mally grasped the root of Thackery's lust firmly in his hands, sliding his fingers expertly against it. As he did, he bent and kissed Thackery's lips. The Hare opened his mouth so their tongues could do sweet battle. His hand slid down Mally's back to cup and squeeze his behind. Mally groaned against his mouth, and it was the sweetest sound that Thackery had ever heard.

"I want you, Mally," Thackery whispered when the kiss broke. "Have me."

"I'll have you," Mally murmured.

He kissed Thackery's nose and chin, then slid down to kiss and lick at his throat, his collarbone, his nipples. He licked and nipped and breathed warmly against the Hare's sensitized skin. His tongue delved into Thackery's belly button. And then almost suddenly…

Mally sank his mouth over Thackery's desire, showing off the skills he had learned during their marriage. Thack knew that the Dormouse had only ever performed this act with him, and that made it all the more special. Every flick and lick teased him towards a crescendo that promised all the sweetness that he had been denied during their hiatus in Wonderland.

"OH TEA!"

Thackery couldn't hold back any longer. His hand twisted the sheets as his climax shook his entire body. He let out a strangled yelp, then a quiet moan as he collapsed against the pillows, gasping for breath. Mally lifted his head and chuckled.

"Ready for more?"

"Yeah."

Mally slid up and pressed his mouth against Thackery's very, very softly and he settled between the Hare's legs and positioned himself to join them. Thackery sighed as they reached that completion, and they began to rock together.

He wrapped his arms around the Dormouse, clinging. It was still so strange being the smaller of the two of them now, when he had been so enormously tall for the first few years they were in California. He wasn't quite sure which way he liked it better, but either way he knew that they fit together perfectly, and making love to Mally was more wondiferous than anything he had ever known.

"I love you, Mally," he murmured breathlessly. "I love you."

"Good," Mally grunted. "Keep saying it. Keep saying it forever."

"I will," Thackery promised, and he meant it, with all his heart.


	27. Chapter 27

Mally had one of the most wonderful nights of sleep that he could remember experiencing in his whole life. He would have liked it to go on for about three days, but he certainly didn't mind the way that Thackery chose to wake him. The Hare's warm breath against his most sensitive flesh made having to leave the peace of dreaming completely worthwhile.

"Good morning, Thack."

"Mmmm…"

"Don't talk with your mouth full… and don't stop."

Thackery lifted his head. "Believing?"

Mally groaned. "I deserved that. Now provolone finish what you started!"

Ten minutes later they were in the shower, and ten minutes after that Mally stood watching Thackery as he attempted to put his wet hair and ears up in a towel turban. The two of them didn't speak much as they fished out some clothes, and Thackery made tea in the coffee maker.

"This is spectacularly bad," Mally commented as he sipped his tea.

"I know," said Thackery apologetically. "Maybe Tarrant will make some that's better. Or we could order from room service. Or go to the restaurant downstairs!"

For a moment Thackery looked excited by this prospect, but then sadness haunted his mismatched green and purple eyes.

"What is it?" Mally asked.

"Alice and I used to have tea there."

"You will again," Mally promised.

"How can you be sure?"

"I'm not, but we have to have faith."

"In Chessur's plan?"

"Well… yes. He might be the biggest Camembert I know, but he is pretty smart."

"I'm glad you noticed," said Chessur, materializing into the room just behind them. Mally jumped, then whirled around, spilling his tea. Oh well, there was an excuse not to drink it. "And I suppose I've been called worse things, Cheese for Brains. Now come along, children. You're late!"

"My clock is two days slow," Mally sneered.

"Late for what?" Thackery asked. "We don't have to work today."

"Did you already forget that we are going to that audition?" Chessur sighed, rubbing his forehead.

"It's not for hours," Mally said.

"We must prepare. Come, to my room. Dime and Tarrant are waiting."

"All right, all right, just let me finish my hair." Mally ran a hand through his blond locks to ensure that it was standing up in its normal spiky condition.

"Hare?" Chessur looked at Thackery, who was still attempting to fix his ears.

"If I don't dry them properly they get too fluffy…"

"I like them fluffy," said Mally.

"NOW!" Chessur was losing his patience. He opened the door and pointed into the hallway. "Put on your work hat if you have to, Thackery, just let's go."

Thackery blinked and set down his brush. Then he smiled, though his eyes were still sad. "I'm glad you care this much about getting Alice back, Chess."

The cat glared at him, then lifted his chin. "Of course I do," he said in a more settled tone. "Now, come."

They shuffled across the hall to the room that Chessur shared with Tarrant. Mally thought that the two of them being roommates was a terrible idea, but there wasn't really anything he could do about it except remember to be extra careful. The room resembled the one Thackery and Mally had used to have the first time they had been in California, with two beds instead of one.

"This is the least number of hats I have ever seen in Tarrant's room," said Thackery, his eyes wide. "In any of his rooms."

Mally nodded. "Just the stack on the table, and on his bed."

"I keep things neat," said Chessur dryly.

Sitting on the edge of the hat-free bed were Dime and Absolem. Dime was in a very modest pale green dress that was not dissimilar to her stage outfit. Absolem was wearing a pink flapper-style dress hat was a bit tight across the chest. Mally tried not to stare, but she caught him and winked at him.

"Got a kiss for me, Mallymkun?" she asked.

Mally stuttered for a moment, looking helplessly at Thackery, who just seemed confused. Thankfully Dime interrupted before he was forced to reply.

"Abby! Honey, you got to slow down. You can't just go around kissing everyone you see! You're gonna turn some frog into a prince!"

"Did you just call me a frog?" Mally asked.

"Maybe she called you a prince," said Thackery.

"I'm surrounded by idiots," Chessur sighed. "Speaking of which, where exactly is Tarrant?"

"He's in the bathroom, changing," said Dime. "And you had best not be calling me an idiot, Baby."

"I wasn't."

"Sure." Dime looked suspicious.

Before they could get into it, Tarrant burst out of the bathroom. His eyes were shining with excitement and he posed dramatically. Mally's mouth fell open. Tarrant was dressed in a short blue skirt with a matching jacket top that had white trim all the way around the hem and collar, white trimmed pockets, and large white buttons. He wore white gloves and a red polka dotted scarf tied around his throat, and a small blue and white hat that matched the jacket and skirt. He even had on tights and blue high heels, which made him distressingly tall.

"What…" said Thackery. "What…"

"What the feta are you wearing?" Mally finished the sentence. "Besides that padded bra."

"I had to pad it," Tarrant said, squeezing his faux female assets. "I'll never marry a prince with an A cup."

"That's his disguise for the audition," said Dime. "Frankly, I think he looks quite smart. Maybe a little help with that make-up, though."

"Why is he wearing a female disguise?" Mally asked, feeling slightly dizzy.

"Because you're auditioning for an all-girls band," said Chessur, grinning so widely that his smile floated off of his face.

"We are?" said Mally.

"Oh yes," said Chessur. "Wait until you see what you'll be wearing."


	28. Chapter 28

"I think you all should know that I am feeling spectacularly murderous right now," said Mallymkun as he emerged from Tarrant and Chessur's bathroom.

Thackery bit back the hysterical laughter that he felt bubbling up in the back of his throat. Mally was in a pink dress with a white petticoat, a white apron and matching cap, a turquoise scarf tied around his throat, and saddle shoes with lacy bobby socks. The apron bore the logo of Flo's V-8 café, where Thackery had had lunch once or twice.

"Splendiferous!" Tarrant crowed, dancing around Mally.

"You do not look like a woman," said Absolem, frowning.

"That's because he forgot his bra," said Tarrant. The Dormouse folded his arms over his chest.

"I'm not even certain you could pass for a waitress," said Dime, shaking her head.

Chessur grinned, his smile floating in front of his face, his eyes twinkling. "Oh, we can fix this."

"I'm not putting on the bra," Mally grumbled.

"But, if it's to save Alice," Thackery said, snickering. "Surely you could manage to wear it for a few hours."

"I can't wait to see what YOU have to wear, Thackery," Mally said.

"Oh, Thackery and I won't be going in disguise," Chessur said glibly. Thackery had to admit he felt relieved by this announcement.

"Why the cheddar not?"

"Alice has already seen us, at Faren's parties. She would see right through the disguise. We will simply escort you to the audition and the two of you will find Alice and work your magic," Chessur waved his hand, wiggling his fingers in emphasis.

"We need to fix you," said Dime, standing up. She brushed Tarrant aside and took a good look at Mally. "We are going to need a wig and some good makeup, and… I'm sorry honey. I think you do need a little padding up top."

"Maybe not quite as much as Tarrant has," Thackery suggested, bouncing up and down on his toes. He hated the way Mally was glaring at him, but to be fair, he was glaring at everyone else as well.

"You're not helping, Thack," said Mally.

"Maybe you should shave your legs," suggested Chessur, sliding a hand up Mally's thigh, under his pink skirt.

"Don't get fresh with me," Mally squeaked, jumping back.

"Hands off the lady," said Thackery, putting himself between them.

"I'm not a lady," Mally snapped.

"No," said Chessur, "You're no lady."

"Just don't touch her," Thackery felt anger bubbling up inside him. He poked Chessur in the chest with one finger and the cat stepped backwards, still grinning.

"Him," Mally grumbled.

"What's wrong with being a woman?" Absolem asked pointed.

"Nothing! I love women," Mally said. "I'm just not one!"

"All right, all right," said Dime. "Relax. Sit down and let me try to work a little magic on you."

"Can't I at least take this apron off?" Mally complained as he plopped himself into a chair, his knees wide apart.

"It's attached to the dress," said Dime. "I'm sorry, I couldn't come by many clothes that would fit the two of you in a hurry, so these will have to do."

"But you and Absolem look so cute," Mally said coyly.

"I am wearing one of Dime's dresses," said Absolem. "It is a pity, because if you were the size you used to be, you would have fit in it as well."

"He's a fine size now," said Thackery.

"I bet," said Absolem and Chessur at the same time.

Thackery sighed and sat down to watch Dime attempt to make his husband look more feminine. It seemed to take forever, and Thack thought he might have dozed off at some point.

"I believe I should spend this time teaching the three of you to act like ladies," Chessur said. "Make sure you listen, Mallymkun."

"Yes," said Absolem. "You need this far more than I do. Really, Chessur. I'm actually a woman – I think I know a bit more about it than you or Tarrant."

"I don't know about that," said Mally. "At least not Tarrant."

"I have often had the pleasure of enjoying femininity," said Tarrant, perching on the edge of the bed with his ankles crossed. "I am wonderful at it! I shall make every gentleman we encounter spoon at my feet!"

"I believe you mean swoon," said Absolem. "And I find myself doubtful of that."

"Isn't he supposed to be trying to kiss Alice?" asked Thackery. "I don't think she is, uh, attracted to women."

"I will make Alice gay for me," Tarrant cheered.

"Maybe I'll make Alice gay for me," Mally grumbled.

"Shh, hold still. I'm painting your lips," Dime told him.

"I bet I can get Alice to kiss me before either of you two can," said Absolem.

"This isn't a contest!" Thackery said, starting to panic. "I'm not even sure it's a good idea!"

"Sure it is, Thackery," said Chessur. "Sure it is."

"It just… it has to work," Dime said with determination. "There you go, sweetie."

Thackery blinked. Mally was transformed. With his long blonde wig and makeup, he really did look like a female.

Well.

At least as much as Tarrant did.

"You're beautiful," said Thackery. Mally grinned at him slowly.

"You like it? Maybe later we can—"

"I do not want to hear this," said Dime. "Okay, you're going to need names. Tarrant, you can be Terry. Absolem, you can just go by Abby, sugar. And Mally—"

"That's a feminine enough name, isn't it, Mrs. Earwicket," Chessur purred.

"It is a very masculine name," Mally sneered.

"How about Molly?" Absolem suggested.

"That's very different," Chessur said, rolling his eyes. "How about Melissa?"

"Mirana?"

"Mary?"

"Mishy?"

"Melanie?"

"Mally is fine!" said Mally.

"Even though it is so incredibly masculine?" Chessur drawled sarcastically.

"Let's just go get this over with!"


	29. Chapter 29

"I don't know how you do it," Mally groused to Absolem and Dime as they walked together towards the Disneyland rehearsal hall. It was just behind the park, so they would need to travel through the backstage area to get there. Tarrant was quite far ahead of the rest of them, but Mally didn't much care about the spectacle that the Hatter was causing. "These shoes are killing me."

"You're so tall," said Thackery, sounding dazed. "So tall."

"Me, or Tarrant?"

"I used to be tall."

"Hold yourself together, bunny," Chessur growled. "If we get through this, I'll buy you a drink."

"I don't want a drink," said Thackery. "I just want our old life back."

"Don't worry, honey," said Dime. "Everything will be fine."

"Do you really believe that?" asked Absolem.

"I have to," Dime said. "Besides, Celia… Alice. Alice is my friend. I know she doesn't belong with Faren. He ain't good to her. But Tarrant… he might be off his rocker, but he's truly in love with her."

"I hope he's truly in love with her enough to break the spell or whatever," Mally complained. "I look like an idiot, I feel like an idiot, and I'm sure we are never going to get away with this."

"You don't have to get the job," Chessur growled. "Just get close to Alice. Dime will introduce you."

"I've met her," Mally said with exasperation.

"Not recently," said Thackery. He looked so sad that Mally couldn't help reaching out to grab his hand.

"I'll do my best," he said.

"Could your best include not complaining?" asked Absolem.

"Fine! Did that catnip wear off? I liked it better when you were trying to sleep me with me."

"When she was what?" said Thackery.

"I'm not certain," Absolem replied. "I do not feel particularly attracted to you right now, but maybe it's just that shade of lipstick."

"Why were you trying to sleep with my husband?" Thackery asked Absolem, sounding wounded.

"I just wanted to see what all the fuss is about," Absolem sighed. "Don't worry. It didn't work out."

"IT DIDN'T WORK OUT!"

"Thackery, you're shouting," Chessur hissed.

"Maybe I do want that drink," Thackery snapped.

"Baby," said Dime firmly, "You are not going to pass out drunk on my couch again."

Mally's eyes widened. "You did what, Thack?"

"Uh…"

"Was that where you were the other night?" Mally snapped, letting go of Thackery's hand.

"Tit for tat," said Chessur. He poked Mally's stuffed bra. "You have the tit. Now everybody needs to calm down. We are almost to the rehearsal hall."

"Where is Tarrant?" asked Dime.

Mally shook his head, the blonde curls of his wig bouncing around his face. He tried to pull himself together. He certainly didn't want to get into an argument with Thackery right now, especially not after how great last night had been. They just needed to get this over with and then maybe their tea times would get back on track. He looked apologetically at the March Hare and offered his hand back. Thackery smiled timidly and took it.

"There she is," said Chessur. "In line for the audition…talking to Alice."

They all screeched to a halt as a unit, and Mally nearly fell off of his high heels. The two of them were chatting animatedly, and he heard Alice's laugh ring out like a bell. It made his heart twist. How many times had he taken that sound for granted? How many times had he taken Alice for granted? He regretted it now, so completely.

Alice looked over in their direction then, and Mally thought he saw a little puff of snow burst out of her fingertips. Her eyes opened wide, then she grinned.

"Thackery!" she called. "Dime! Baby! How are you?"

Mally took a deep breath as they approached. "How does she remember you?" he asked Thackery.

"It's just from meeting me the other day," said Thackery. "Not from…from before."

"It's nice to see you all," Alice said. "Dime, I'm glad you're here. I think you really have a shot at this. Do you know Daphne? I just met her in line."

"Daphne?" Mally whispered to Tarrant.

Tarrant winked at him. "I never did like the name Terry," he said in a sweet, feminine tone.

"Oh, we know her," said Chessur, grinning. "I'd like you to meet Abby, and Mally as well."

"Oh, is this your wife, Thackery?" Alice beamed.

"I'm not—" Mally started to say, but then he remembered he was supposed to be a female. He lowered his voice to a more feminine range. "I'm not always lucky enough to meet my husband's friends."

"I'm Celia, but everyone calls me C.C.," said Alice. "It's so nice of Thackery to escort you here. Not every man is as supportive to his woman's career."

"Didn't your Faren turn up?" Chessur asked pointedly.

"I am so excited about this audition," said Dime loudly. "It was real kind of you to tell me about it, C.C., but I think I'm happy with Five and Dime. So I'm going to leave you all here and head back. Good luck, er, Daphne! Slam, Baby—this is just for the ladies, so you ought to come with me."

"Meet me at the Jolly Holiday after?" said Thackery. Mally nodded.

"I need the job more, anyway," Tarrant said in his sweet feminine voice. "I've lost two jobs already this week."

"You poor thing," said Alice. "What instrument do you play?"

"Oh, I can play any of them," the Hatter replied.

"Is that so?" said Absolem.

"Oh yes," said Tarrant, "But mostly I sing."

"Me, too!" said Alice. "Wouldn't it be fun if we got to sing together?"


	30. Chapter 30

Thackery and Chessur sat at a table in front of the Jolly Holiday Bakery, waiting for Tarrant, Mally, and Absolem to return from the audition. Dime had returned to California Adventure after making them promise to return the borrowed clothes to her when the others were finished with them.

"What if it doesn't work?" Thackery said nervously, tugging on one of his long, furry bunny ears.

"What could go wrong?" Chessur asked dryly.

"Well, to start with—"

"That was a rhetorical question," the cat sighed. "I had hoped to go into the audition myself and provide some purr…suation…"

"So why don't you just… Poof!" Thackery wiggled his hands at Chessur.

"Tarrant seemed to have the situation under control." Chessur shrugged. "How hard can it be to get Alice to kiss him?"

"You really don't know anything about love, do you, Chessur?" Thackery tilted his head.

"Don't look at me like that—like you feel sorry for me. I know plenty about love," the cat muttered. He looked down at his finger tips and popped out one claw, then began nibbling at it.

"Did you ever really love Mally?" Thackery asked breathlessly. Suddenly he felt very dizzy.

Chessur lifted his head and looked straight into the March Hare's eyes. It was hard to fathom what he was thinking or what secrets were held in those green depths. For a long time he didn't answer, and Thackery began to sweat.

"No," the cat said at last. "I only ever wanted to consume him. And I still do." Chessur sneered, but Thackery didn't quite believe him.

"You wouldn't really," Thackery said softly.

"Are you proposing a challenge? A bet, perhaps?" Chessur began to grin, the smile floating off of his face, and his eyes crossed.

"Absolutely not," Thackery replied.

"Then stop probing. Your wife is safe. Every delicious inch of him."

"He doesn't like it when you call him that," Thackery said, frowning.

"When I call him your wife, or when I call him delicious?"

"Both!"

"Why do you think I do it?"

"You're horrible."

"Thank you."

"You need… maybe you need to find someone… who can love you—" Thackery began, but the cat's smugly amused face turned to stone.

"Stop, Thackery."

"But—"

"Bunny. Let me tell you something. Not everyone in this world or in ours is meant to find love, or even wants it. Don't try to play matchmaker. I swear to tea that if you try to set me up on a date that I will eat that hapless soul for dinner. Do you understand?" Chessur's green eyes flared and it was like gazing into the gates of Hell.

Thackery didn't think he could open his own eyes any wider. His stomach twisted with cold shock and he nodded slowly. "Yes."

"Good."

Before they could pursue the matter any further, Thackery spotted Tarrant, Mally and Absolem walking towards them. How much time had passed? It seemed like forever, or maybe just one second. Tarrant seemed to have mastered the high heels but Mally was limping along, looking less than ladylike. Of course, he still looked more ladylike than Absolem, who was wearing her yellow sneakers with her pink flapper dress.

And then, behind them, was Alice.

Thackery's heart skipped a beat.

"How did the audition go, ladies?" Chessur asked, arching at eyebrow at them.

"Well, Celia here just nailed it," said Tarrant in a feminine voice. "I'm sure she'll get the job, if they forgive her for the snowstorm."

"I did get a little nervous," said Alice, her cheeks turning pink.

"The room turned into an ice skating rink," said Absolem.

"You do make a divine skating partner," Tarrant said, looking at Alice fondly. It did nothing to help her blush.

"Well, thank you, Daphne."

"It was a disaster," Mally said loudly, in his own voice. Everyone turned to look at him, including a confused Alice, so he switched to a more feminine voice. "Um… for me. I don't think I got the part."

"They offered me a contract on the spot," Absolem said, shrugging. "I turned it down. I like the stretchy sideways piano. I'm going to stay in the pirate band. Unless they will give me my old job in security back."

"You were a security guard, Abby?" Alice asked excitedly. "That sounds exciting. I'd love to hear about it sometime."

"You would be surprised at what sort of chaos goes on around here," said Absolem. She lifted a hand and stroked Alice's cheek gently with the back of her knuckles. It was such a tender gesture that Thackery's breath caught in his throat, and he heard Alice gasp as well.

"Y-yes," Alice said. "I suppose I would be surprised."

"Hm," said Chessur. "I'm a little surprised myself."

Thackery wasn't sure what he meant, but before he could ponder on it much, a flash of movement caught his eye.

"Look!" he grabbed Chessur's elbow. "There's Faren!"

"We should get out of here," said Chessur, and with that he vanished.

"That's a talent!" Alice gasped.

"One that the rest of us lack," said Absolem. "He is correct, however. Let's go. I don't like the look of those pirates with him."

"But we know them," said Mally.

"There they are!" Mathison shouted. "Deceitful thieves!"

"What did you do, Mally?" Tarrant asked in falsetto.

"I don't know!" Mally said, also in falsetto. "Let's get out of here! Come on, Thackery!"

"Run," said Absolem, pointing towards the Matterhorn.

They ran.


	31. Chapter 31

Thackery grabbed Mally's hand. Out of the corner of his eye, Mally saw Tarrant grab Alice's and the five of them hurried off towards the Matterhorn. Faren, Mathison, and a gang of angry pirates were bearing down on them, though it wasn't easy to dodge through the crowded park.

"Why are we running away from Faren?" Alice asked.

"Show you in a minute, dear," said Tarrant.

"Where are we headed?" Thackery gasped.

"Water!" said Absolem. "How else do you escape from pirates?"

Mally shook his head, not sure how that made any sense, or why the pirates were angry at them. He also wished that he could take off his stupid disguise and that Tarrant would just go and kiss Alice already.

"He had plenty of chances!" he told Thackery as they dodged tourists with strollers.

"What? Who?"

"Daphne there! To kiss her! But he just…kept…talking!"

"That sounds accurate," said Thackery.

"It is," said Absolem, who was power-walking next to them. "Don't worry, I have another plan."

"Great," said Mally. "Great!"

"Turn left at the mountain!"

They ran past the Alice in Wonderland ride, which had cars shaped like caterpillars. Absolem had always hated it, and she was studiously ignoring it now.

"That looks like fun!" Tarrant called out gaily.

"Daphne, no!" yelled Absolem.

"Daphne, yes!" Mally yelled back, just to mess with Absolem but somehow they made it past the entrance.

"Tea cups?" asked Thackery.

"Those make you throw up, dear, remember?" Mally said in his terrible girl's voice.

"But…I love tea…"

"Thackery wants to go for a spin!" cried Tarrant. "What do you think, Celia?"

"Do you find either of those rides…appealing?" Mally asked, trying not to lose his breath.

"How will we escape from pirates if we go on rides?" Alice asked.

"She's right. I said we need water!" said Absolem. "Keep going!"

"I can probably just reason with Faren," Alice insisted but Tarrant was nearly dragging her along. "Daphne, you are so strong for a woman…even such a…tall…lady…"

"There's strength in madness," said Thackery.

"Is she…" Alice looked back at Thackery and whirled her finger around her ear.

"We are all mad here," said Absolem. "Including you."

"Especially you," Mally muttered. "I'm tired of running and I want this over with. For the love of gouda! Somebody kiss her!"

"What?" said Alice.

"Go down the ramp and get in that boat!" said Absolem.

"It's a Small World?" said Mally and Thackery at once. "NO!"

"Trust Abby!" Tarrant sang out.

"Do we trust her?" Thackery asked.

"Well," said Mally, "I do remember what happened last time she told us to get in a boat."

"We got married," Thackery said softly.

"Yeah."

"All right, fine, but I'm going to get that song stuck in my head all night."

Down the ramp they ran, passing the family trying to get into the boat at the dock and jumping in ahead of them. Tarrant and Alice got in the first row, Mally, Thackery and Absolem right behind them. The cast members running the ride shouted at them, but the boat launched anyway. Mally looked back at the dock and saw Faren and the pirates approaching. They also managed to commandeer a boat, but they were at least six boats behind the five of them.

"Now what?" Mally demanded of Absolem.

Absolem looked at Tarrant, in the row ahead of them. "Daphne."

Tarrant turned around. "Yes?"

"It's time."

"Tea time?"

"Tarrant!" Mally snapped. "Kiss Alice."

Celia looked confused. "Who—what are you—"

Tarrant turned and looked into Alice's eyes. He stroked her cheek with his fingers. She shivered but didn't pull away. However, Mally felt a change in the atmosphere. It was getting cold inside the ride, and he was sure that the cold was coming from Alice.

"I need you to remember," Tarrant said.

He bent his head and tenderly brought his mouth to hers. Mally saw her respond. He eyes closed, and a teardrop froze on her cheek. It began to snow softly, directly over their boat.

"Did it work?" Mally asked, forgetting to use his lady voice. He really wanted to take off his wig. It itched terribly.

"Something's happening," Alice whispered.

"Remember," Tarrant whispered back. "Remember all of our lifetimes."

Absolem leaned over the edge of the seat and brought her mouth to Alice's. The blonde girl's eyes flew wide open with surprise, but then she melted into that kiss as well. Mally wondered who Absolem had been practicing with, because she seemed to have improved, based on what he could see. When she pulled away, Alice's hand flew to her mouth.

"Well," she said, "That was unexpected."

"Thackery, you next," said Absolem.

"W-what?"

"Don't you see? Forgive me, Alice… but we ALL need to kiss you," said Absolem.

Alice's face turned bright red when she looked at Thackery, and Mally frowned. He hadn't forgotten the time that Alice had decided she was in love with Thack and screwed up both time, memory, and their lives. That had been when Chessur had taken advantage of Mally, and it still haunted him sometimes.

"No," said Mally. "Don't do it, Thack."


	32. Chapter 32

"I think I have to," Thackery whispered, clutching Mally's hand. He knew why Mally didn't want him to kiss Alice. He understood completely. "If it's the only way… well… do you want to go first?"

"I'm not sure I want to kiss all of you," Alice said, lifting her chin up. "Though I would kiss Abby again…"

"What about Daphne?" asked Thackery.

"I don't think she's actually a girl," Alice whispered loudly.

"I'm not," Tarrant whispered back loudly. "Do you want to see my—"

"NO!" said everyone in the boat, except Alice.

"Why are you all doing this, anyway?" Alice demanded. "What am I supposed to remember?"

"Your life before Faren," said Absolem.

"I…I… never thought about…" Alice stammered, tilting her head. "But there was a glimmer…"

Thackery leaned forward and smooched her mouth as quickly as he could, trying to get it over with before either Alice or Mally knew what was going on. The snow flurry over their boat intensified, the wind whipping through Thack's hair and chilling his ears. Alice looked at him, seeming half-confused, and half-aroused, her eyes almost closed.

"Do you remember?" Thackery asked.

"I… screwed it up… I was trying to save… someone…" Alice murmured.

"Mally," said Absolem.

"Oh, what? Me too? Just so you know, I'm not a girl either. I'm Thackery's husband, not his wife," the Dormouse snapped.

"I don't care if the two of you are—mmmph!"

Mally kissed her in a way that looked to Thackery as if he thought it were a contest and he was hell-bent on winning. This struck Thack and funny, and he began to laugh. He laughed so hard that he snorted, which in turn made Tarrant laugh. Soon Mally and even Absolem, whom Thackery was sure he had never, ever heard laugh before, were all chortling uproariously, so much so that the boat began to rock.

When Alice's laughter joined in their own, Thackery saw a light dawn in her blue eyes. She was coming back. She was starting to remember. But something was missing, something wasn't quite right…

Tea.

"We need Chess," he said, astounded.

"Yes," said Absolem.

Thackery looked back over his shoulder. Faren and the pirates were still in boat far behind them, and it seemed ridiculous that they hadn't tried jumping from boat to boat to get closer. Well, maybe they were enjoying the ride… As he was watching, he saw Chessur pop into the back row of their boat.

"Did I hear my name?" he asked, grinning.

"We need you to kiss Alice," Thackery blurted out.

"What did I tell you about matchmaking, bunny?"

"He's correct, Chessur," said Absolem. "We need you."

"We have always needed you," said Tarrant, no longer using the falsetto voice. "You bring balance. If you do not kiss her, all is lost."

"All is lost," Alice whispered.

The weather inside the ride intensified, the snow swirling around them. Thackery scooted closer to Mally, shivering. Mally drew him close, kissing his cheek softly.

"You're shaking, Thack."

"I'm terrified."

And he was. This was it. Either the spell would break or they would all freeze to death inside the ride. Alice tossed her head back and lifted up her arms. The snow doubled, tripled, and the water around the boats began to freeze. Thackery could hear Faren and the pirates yelling. They were getting up from their boat, venturing out on the ice.

"We are running out of time," said Absolem.

Chessur stood up. The ice around the boat held it stock still. He held his hand out to Alice. She stood as well, her hair covered in glistening snow, the wind whipping in back. She climbed carefully over the seats and headed for Chessur. She looked dazed, and Thackery wondered what was going on inside of her… though he could guess. It was a storm. Alice's emotions, held deep inside her locked memory, were manifesting as ice and snow, causing an endless winter in California, and in Wonderland.

The Cheshire Cat pulled Alice into his arms and grinned at her while the others watched. Thackery's stomach twisted as he recalled his conversation with Chess from earlier. He could not imagine what the cat was thinking in this moment.

The snow flurries grew so thick, the wind so intense, that Thackery never did see what happened. One moment it was howling, the next dead silence rang out through the ride. The music had stopped playing. The dolls had stopped moving. When he could see again, Alice was back in the front row of the boat, kissing Tarrant as if her life depended on it. Chessur was gone again, but on the seat of the boat where he had been standing was the bag containing the two bottles of rum that they had been taking to the pirate band.

The pirates made their way across the ice towards them. Thackery looked at Mally. "Should we run?"

"No," said Absolem.

"Why not?" said Mally. "Those guys have swords and pistols and knives and…and…slingshots…"

"Faren is gone," said Absolem. "They will not harm us. Hm. Except maybe you. Would you please return that striped hat?"

"I love that hat," said Mally.

"Just give them the rum," said Thackery. "It's in that bag. Chessur was supposed to deliver it."

"And you believed that he would?" Mally asked. Thackery just shook his head.

"At the time… Frankly, I'm not sure I should ever believe anything that Chessur says."

"Still," said Alice. "I am grateful to him. I wouldn't have remembered who I am if he hadn't agreed to… to kiss me."

"Why did we all have to kiss you again?" asked Mally.

"Alice's true love is the band," said Absolem. "She needs each of us… just as we need her."

"So what happened to Faren?"

"He melted," said Alice.

"Some people are worth melting for," said Tarrant. "It's spring now. Time for the show to come back from hibernation."

Thackery could not have been more ready.


	33. Chapter 33

Mally thought he could not have been happier than the night that the Mad T Party band returned to the stage at Disney California Adventure. Freeze the Night had ended, they had their show back, and they had Alice back.

For nearly two years, life was perfect.

Disneyland celebrated its Diamond Anniversary, and the band costumes were covered with sparkling gems. They had new songs and old, and every night was a perfect Unbirthday party.

Chessur left him alone.

It was strange, really, when he thought about it, but Mally didn't question his good luck. After a few months, he forgot to be afraid of the cat, even found himself laughing and joking with him from time to time, like the days before Chessur had started chasing him, the days before he and Thackery had fallen in love.

Thackery was perfect.

The March Hare's anxiety and madness still flared up from time to time, and the month of March held its own set of challenges, but he was a wonderful, loving, and attentive husband, and Mally knew he was the luckiest Dormouse in the world.

From time to time, Mally still played in the pirate band. Thackery really seemed to enjoy jamming with Five and Dime, so they both kept their day jobs. Absolem and Chessur stayed as well, though Tarrant devoted himself to the Mad T Party and Alice devoted herself to keeping him out of trouble.

Alice and Tarrant were still engaged. Occasionally she still managed a small blizzard, but mostly, Alice was back to normal, whatever that was. She and Tarrant went back to living together, and Chessur was allowed his own room, which pleased the cat greatly.

From time to time, Absolem indulged in the Party Time Catnip and everybody had to watch out. Mally suspected that this was why Chessur needed his own room.

Dime was granted a license to visit Disneyland whenever she wanted, and sometimes sang at the French Market in New Orleans square. She was allowed to bring gifts of rum for the pirates, and relations between them were good.

And then, one morning in February, they were summoned to a meeting in the Lily Room.

There were no tea things on the table. The room was filled with managers with grim expressions. Thackery grabbed Mally's hand when he saw them. They both knew what this meant. If they got sent back to Wonderland, they would be separated again. Mally set his mouth grimly. He was determined to do anything it took to prevent this. Nivens and the Tweedles had been summoned as well.

The show was closing.

There was no way to soften the blow. The Mad T Party band would no longer perform at California Adventure. The beautiful stage costumes would be turned back in to management. The party was, at long last, truly, permanently over.

"There is hope," said Alice to the others as she stepped in front of them.

"No, Alice," said Chessur. "We cannot allow you to make any deals for us this time."

"Are you sure?" Mally asked, his voice squeaky. "Because I'd take a deal."

"Mally and I have a lot more to lose than any of the rest of you," Thackery said quietly. "But Chess is right. Mally, we can't allow Alice to sacrifice herself again."

The lump in the Dormouse's throat made it impossible to speak. He nodded his head, his brain whirling. Mally's heart began to beat so quickly that he feared he might black out.

"There is a way," said Nivens. He glanced at one of the managers and they nodded, permitting the White Rabbit to speak on their behalf. "We may stay on as employees of the park if we take other positions."

"And what are the positions?" Absolem asked, folding her arms across her chest.

One of the managers handed Nivens a pile of contracts. He pulled out a pair of glasses and set them on his nose, then looked at the one on top.

"I am offered a special event DJ contract… uh… ears covered. I accept." The manager handed Nivens a pen and he signed the contract and passed it back. The White Rabbit looked relieved, and smiled.

"What about the rest?" asked Alice.

"Mallymkun is offered a full time contract in the pirate band," Nivens said, reading the next page.

He looked at the Dormouse and offered the paper. Mally took it, trying not to let the others see that his fingers were trembling. He looked over the paper, skimming for any important details. He knew he should read it more thoroughly, but he also knew that he wasn't going to. The pay was the same as he was getting now. He was guaranteed two days off a week – that he had never had! He would get to keep the hotel room at the Grand Californian. He would stay human. Relief flooded him and he showed it to Thackery.

"It's good, Thack. But I won't stay unless Thackery gets to stay, too."

Nivens nodded. "Thackery is offered the contract with Five and Dime. Chessur, the same."

"Hand it here," said the cat. "I'll sign.

While Chessur scribbled on his contract, Thackery perused his carefully and Mally looked over his shoulder. The March Hare finally looked up at the Dormouse with his wide, beautiful green and purple mismatched eyes.

"It says ears covered – but that's just for shows, isn't it?" Thackery asked, grabbing his furry bunny ears.

"Yes," said Nivens, sounding a bit exasperated. "You and I will both keep our ears. They just will be harder to see when we are performing."

Mally took the pen and signed his contract, then pressed it into Thackery's hand. "Sign, Thack. Sign and we get to stay together."

Thackery didn't hesitate any longer, and Nivens moved on.

"Absolem is offered the security guard job."

"Done," said Absolem, but she spent a very long time reading the contract before she signed it.

"The Tweedles—"

"Oh, we are going back, as it were," said Tweedle Dee.

"Likewise, we choose to unarrive," said Tweedle Dum.

"Best of luck, friends," they said together, and with a nod, the towering twins followed one of the managers out of the room.

"Well," said Nivens after a long moment, "I shall miss them."

Mally looked at Alice and saw tears on her cheeks. She looked very pale, and he could feel her terror as she waited for her contract to be announced. Nivens looked at the last page in his hands.

"Alice is offered a role in a new musical show opening in the Hyperion theater. A starring role. It—it's a good contract, Alice. I suggest you take it."

Mally wondered suddenly, then, that if Alice didn't take the contract, if it would make the rest of theirs null and void. She had always, somehow, controlled all of their destinies.

"What about Tarrant?" Alice whispered.

"Tarrant… Tarrant isn't offered a contract. He will unarrive…" Nivens looked a bit devastated.

"Unarrive," Tarrant murmured. "Without Alice?"

"No…" said Thackery. "No!"

"There is a way," said Absolem. "Did any of you read the fine print in any of your contracts? Any spouse from the performer's native land will be granted permission to stay. Alice, all you have to do is marry Tarrant, and he will be able to remain. Of course, you will probably have to support him—"

"That's fine!" said Alice. "Let's get married…right now!"

"Well," said Tarrant. "I do believe that would be rather acceptable. Absolem, if you would be so kind…"

Mally shook his head. "I can't believe they are going to get married without even any cheese…"

Thackery laughed until he snorted. "Oh, Mally! Don't you see? It's Happily Ever After!"

And, it was.


End file.
